Shy toddler - looking for advice

[Redhats]

My son (2.5) is quite shy, he struggles with new places/ new people and says he doesn’t want to go / clings to me once there.
For instance we went to a party this weekend which he’d been really excited about all week, before we left he started crying saying he didn’t want to go. I showed him some photos of the church hall it was in and explained what would happen at the party and he agreed to go. Once we got there he clung to most of the time, wouldn’t join in, had a few tears. I didn’t make a big deal of this and let him hold my hand and we stood together near the action. Towards the end he started taking part in the dancing and games and really enjoyed himself, he didn’t want to leave.

I know a big part of this is his age and he is still really young and it may get better as he gets older however I was a desperately shy child too and I’m hoping to arm myself with some advice. My parents basically dismissed the fact I was shy, pushed me into lots of things I wasn’t comfortable with and it left me extremely anxious, I still struggle a bit socially now. I guess I’m worried my son is taking after me (my husband is uber confident in any situation and can talk to anyone). I’m hoping to get some advice on how to best support him in these situations and what to do and not do. I know it’s completely fine to be shy and not everyone is confident but I don’t want him to become anxious with it like I did.

No advice I’m afraid bur following with interest as my DS is the same. He’s a year old but is very shy is most situations and I worry about him starting school next year

Do exactly what you’re doing!

Explaining what is going to happen is really important, as is letting him settle in his own time.

Do not give in to the suggestion that he doesn’t want to go. It’s really important that he is exposed to these things, with you there to support him.

This is really common in young children - he will get there. You’re dealing with it brilliantly.

It'll be his age. I had one the same. Just continue to do what you are doing. And accept you've got a limpet. Eventually you will just be the person to hold his coat and stand there. Whilst he goes off . Much better to do it slowly and at his speed rather than force him into a situation. It's like training a dog. The more he is confident that you will be where he left you the more he will go off and explore.

Mine is now a young adult and whilst is still prone to hanging back and taking stock of a room is also the life and soul of a party. Me - I'm chronically shy and will hang back behind a pillar.

Could it also be overwhelm? My DC (nearly 3, who I think is quite sociable) is the same. Went to a party this weekend and took a long time - 40 mins - to ease into it (clinging, wanting to play with me etc) despite having friends there. Once he did, he had a blast. I think it’s age related.