worried about teen dd acting strange around older lad from estate

[softgreycat]

hi all i dont rlly know where to start but dd is 15 and usually quiet keeps to herself bit moody typical teen but lately shes been going out loads after school saying its with her mate but her mate txt me last night asking if dd was ok bc she hasnt seen her all week

i tried asking dd where shes been and she just shrugged said stop being controlling mum its normal which felt off bc shes never like that shes normally glued to her room on her phone
this morning i found her school bag shoved behind the sofa with a hoodie in it that def isnt hers its massive and smells of that lynx spray or summat i asked her and she went bright red said its just someones i borrowed then she stormed out slaming the door

a lady up our road stopped me on way back from shop n asked gently if dd was seeing that older boy hanging about near the garages i didnt even know there was an older boy
she said she saw dd with a lad who looked too old like 19 maybe and they were arguing kind of doorslammy vibe but dd was crying and they both walked off quick

now im sat here panicking dont know if im overthinking or if i shud ring school or what or try get in touch with her mate again but i dont wanna embarass dd and make it worse

has anyone had a teen start acting like this suddenly i feel sick writing this i just want her safe i feel like i dont know whats going on anymore

I would be worried too OP, especially if the other lad is 19 (we don't know this for sure though). What kind of relationship do you have with DD? Do you think you could have a calm chat with her?

Having been the teenage girl in this situation maybe you just need to talk to her, preferably in the car or on a walk (less confrontational) and ask if she's seeing someone, that you wouldn't have a problem if she was but were just wondering. (This keeps it casual and lets her know it's safe to open up) If she then opens up to you you can ascertain more of the situation. Is he actually much older for instance or does he just look it? Then you can gently talk about how people should behave in relationships and that if someone is shouting at her regularly he's not right for her. Hopefully she'll open up and it's nothing to panic about.