Normally I am not fussed about being single but today was so hard

[Thingsyoucantadmitoutloud]

I've been single since my DS was 8 months old, he turned 9 last week. My dd Is almost 11 ( fled dv he was found guilty, not allowed to contact or communicate with me or the children )

Normally I'm really proud of myself for getting this far on my own and any sadness I feel about our situation I just ignore it and get on with it

But today was just so hard. I get really stressed going to new places & use Google maps a lot to make things easier.

I took my kids out today to a new place and when I ordered us an uber the pin had moved and I couldn't find where we were supposed to be. We ended up walking for about 20 minutes in the rain trying to find a pick up point for the taxi and it's the first time in 8 years I've thought to myself, I wish someone else was here to help me. My kids are happy and healthy but I've just been so upset since. I'm going to have to stay single until my children are grown, ill be mid 40's by the time I can date again? It just seems so sad

I can't risk bringing a man into their lives, he could hurt them, he could hurt me, it's just not worth the risk

But tonight for the first time in a long time I'm really really sad about it

Sending big hugs, OP... I hear you and whilst you should definitely be proud of escaping and everything in between, you're also allowed to miss what you don't have!

For me, it was when, after a really wonderful day at a theme park with a friend, she just off hand said her DH had got the dinner on and it would be ready when they walked in the door... whereas for me, I'd be wrangling tired DC whilst pulling together food that was both healthy and which my (at the time) fussy DS would eat and then it'd be late and bath and bed and story and ALL ON ME... I just remember thinking - god, if only one of those things could be done by someone else...

Ah OP, when things go wrong for me I always try to think of something worse. So you couldn’t find the location, imagine being with some dose that couldn’t find it either and you ended up arguing about where you were meant to be in front of the kids. You seem like an awesome mother putting your kids first and I wish you the best.

Being single can be tough and people try to take advantage. The problem is that whenever I wish there was someone to advocate for me I come to the realization that there is no one I know who has my verbal skills in doing so. Unless I need a couple of "big mates" to put the frighteners on someone I tend to do it all myself.

(((hugs))) don't feel bad about being directionally challenged, I use Google maps all the time, and live view the street almost the entire way so that I can see the landmarks and get an idea of where I'm going. I am also single, not entirely by choice, and while most of the time I'm perfectly all right with being independent yes, sometimes you think damn. It would be really great to have a partner, someone to help me out, someone to be there. I think you're better off on your own than you are with someone in your life who you can't trust or count on and it sounds like you've definitely had to learn that the hard way. You are so strong, you were so brave, I'm sure that you're an amazing inspiration to your children even if you guys did walk around 20 minutes in the rain today, hey, we all get lost. We all have hard days. Wishing you many great days ahead

I get that it was challenging today. Well done on giving them a day out.

I do think that just having a mate there might have made it easier…no need for a man.
Annoying as it can sometimes be to make all the decisions on your own, it’s also bloody empowering.
40’s is a great time to be looking. It’s when a lot of regrouping takes place.