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Child arrangement order- would you stop contact if it wasn’t consistent?

2 replies

IsItMe24 · 24/11/2025 09:38

Sorry I’m not sure if this is the right place to post. Just want some outside opinions to make sure the history isn’t making me biased (ex was/is an abusive narcissist)
Had an order in place now for a year which gives my ex contact one day every other weekend. Sometimes he cancels or will ask for a different day. For the sake of consistency for the children I do agree if I can do the day he asks as otherwise it would be a month in between visits, although sometimes that still does happen.
It has now been 6 weeks since he’s seen them. The reason being a family member died who he wasn’t particularly close to but I guess family is family. But AIBU to think that doesn’t mean you can just not see your kids for 6 weeks?! If that was me I’d still have to carry on and care for them regardless. It frustrates me that ultimately it’s the kids that will be affected as it’s fair on them to have inconsistent contact all the time. Right now they’re still little and I feel would probably be less damaged if he just stopped contact. But he’d probably take me back to court if I stopped it and I’m presuming they would grant in his favour as the courts don’t care about all this drama? Just think it’s really unfair that he can decide whether he wants to see them or not with no repercussions but I’d probably get into trouble if I were to say I’m not taking them anymore.
What would you do? Just carry on taking them?
And I can’t have a conversation with him about it as we don’t communicate directly and it needs to stay that way.

OP posts:
getsomehelp · 24/11/2025 13:46

You take them ? I wouldn't deliver.

IsItMe24 · 24/11/2025 16:59

Yes it’s in the court order that I have to pick up and collect. But tbf I wouldn’t want him coming to my house anyway

OP posts:
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