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Original poster

Am I being unreasonable?

11 replies

41mum1984 · 21/11/2025 13:00

I had an appendectomy and other half has been looking after me. Yesterday (I'm still sore and struggling to move anywhere fast) he went out with work people. He messaged to say he would take our youngest to school in the morning and he wouldn't be late. He never came home. I struggled to get my 6yr old to school and he showed up at home at 11am. I am so angry and so upset..there were no messages and I just felt so abandoned. Am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
Rocknrollstar · 21/11/2025 13:34

Even without your operation this is unacceptable behaviour.

BuffaloCauliflower · 21/11/2025 13:35

Does he not come home often? That’s outrageous behaviour from an adult with responsibilities

VerityBlueSky · 21/11/2025 13:37

It is bad he didn't come home. When did you have your operation?

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Abracadabrador · 21/11/2025 13:57

He's a terrible boyfriend and parent. He's showing you how much he values you. Once you've healed, decide how you want to proceed with your life and your happiness.
Do you own the house?

Original poster
41mum1984 · 21/11/2025 14:20

Had it on Sunday so over the worst but still very sore. He has done this before and also announced he had gambled all his wage last month so been navigating this as well. There's just so many red flags but he makes me think it's me being unreasonable. I am just drained ...he came back, went to sleep and woke up apologising but I just told him I want him out now because we just seem low on his priority list :(

OP posts:
Original poster
41mum1984 · 21/11/2025 14:21

Abracadabrador · 21/11/2025 13:57

He's a terrible boyfriend and parent. He's showing you how much he values you. Once you've healed, decide how you want to proceed with your life and your happiness.
Do you own the house?

It's rented. Have two children though as well so it's not as clear cut as just me

OP posts:
Tillow4ever · 21/11/2025 14:29

You said “my 6yr old” - is your partner their father? How long have you been together?

With your update I think you should get out of the relationship anyway - he sounds awful. I’m just curious as to whether it could be a clean break or if you are tied to him through the kids.

Zempy · 21/11/2025 14:32

41mum1984 · 21/11/2025 14:20

Had it on Sunday so over the worst but still very sore. He has done this before and also announced he had gambled all his wage last month so been navigating this as well. There's just so many red flags but he makes me think it's me being unreasonable. I am just drained ...he came back, went to sleep and woke up apologising but I just told him I want him out now because we just seem low on his priority list :(

Dump him. Make a plan to leave this shitshow when you can. 💐

BoyBoyBoy889 · 21/11/2025 16:43

Wow. Leave.

Gambling doesn't get better. Ever. I've seen it before. He will ruin all your lives.

TalulahJP · 21/11/2025 17:51

Yeah that’s really bad. Ducks in a row time
sorry OP 🦆 🦆 🦆

Original poster
41mum1984 · 21/11/2025 20:44

Thank you all. I should add our youngest is his child...my eldest he's step dad. I know the right thing to do ...I somehow end up just feeling bad and like I'm going overboard. I'm so tired I've told him to just leave me alone ...but he keeps apologising saying it won't happen again and he didn't mean to let me down....trying to stay strong

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