Expecting and building a house

[FSR01]

Hey! It's my first time posting and I'm in desperate need of advice. So, I found out I'm pregnant and I would say by accident, but we were playing with fire...anyway. We're in the middle of a self build and it's only my partner and his dad building it and probably wont be ready for another year. Were currently living in a static caravan and we're worried that it isn't enough space and will be too cold for a baby. I'm also dreading telling our families incase it's the wrong decision.

Help and advice please

Thank you 😊

So who earns the money?

How we are paying for the house build isn't anyone's business and that isn't the point of this post?

It's quite relevant if, for example, the person working and earning the money is also you. Because to put that on you on top of everything else isn't great.

Ok…I get that..but these are all stressors on a relationship. So if you want to keep all this information to yourself only you can assess whether this is going to backfire. A baby is going to make everything 10 times more stressful… believe me! So any issues you have at hand now, you need to work them out.

You’ll be fine. People live on rubbish dumps around the world and survive. I lived in a house with no roof or back when my DD was born, it was fine… difficult at times but I remembered how lucky I was, gave my head a wobble and got on with it. Congratulations!

Thank you! Some positivity. I suppose I just wanted some people who have gone through it as well to give me advice and helpful advice at that

Well I went through similar…we ended up
divorced, so take from that what you want. 😅

In very practical terms, if you are currently going out to work each day and just coming home to eat & sleep, suddenly finding yourself in the caravan for 24 hills a day with a small squawky newborn will be tough.

If the build is already 3 years in, surely your DH must be at the point where a kitchen, bathroom and bedroom can be liveable in over the next 9 months. How far through is the build? Does it have a roof, plumbing, electrics? If not, do they actually have the skills and qualifications to turn a shell into a home? After all, most Grand Designs projects are completed within 3 years and often with the owners holding down proper jobs alongside to bring in the working capital.

With kindness, you're clutching at any positive responses and ignoring any that are raising concerns. From what you've posted, your DH sounds clueless when it comes to project management - none of the reasons you've given for delays are valid with proper prior planning. You've convinced yourself that there are no reputable builders so your DH has to do everything himself but that's ridiculous. Unless you're on a very tight budget and his earning potential is very low, find good trades, get them booked in and get the project wrapped up. It will be very miserable trying to manage life with a new baby and no clear plan to get the house finished.

I think it will all be fine, OP.
You and your partner love each other. You are a good team.
You want to have a house together, and a baby together, and soon you will have both!
Tell your families, they know that you are an established couple and that you love each other. I'm sure they will be happy and supportive.