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Emotional 6 year old DD

1 reply

fableless · 20/11/2025 00:01

Hello, name change, long time contributor.

My daughter is 6.5 and is really emotional.

She has learned to articulate her feelings, which is good, but I'm finding it really hard to deal with the darker moments. She starts these really sad chats about the things that are bad about her, why her life is awful, why no one likes her etc. None of which are true. She is funny, creative, caring, and just lovely person.

I would say I am not naturally empathetic, more of a "get on with it" type of person, so I am trying hard to listen and empathise without indulging it too much. I've tried different tactics (reassurance, validating her feelings etc.) and sometimes do shut it down and distract her otherwise I think she'd wallow forever!

I think it's connected with school. As soon as she started "formal" learning in Year 1 her self-esteem plumeted. She is struggling with some elements of learning (mostly maths) and friendships. She regularly says that she wishes she didn't have to go to school and really misses playing. Sometimes she gets really upset about it. This evening she said "Mummy, I just don't think I'm a school type of person. Me and school aren't a good match." which broke my heart! I am not sure if I am seeing the past through rose tinted specs but I feel she used to be so much happier before Year 1 started!!

The school she goes to is the best a state school can be - calm, caring, good results etc. so I feel like if she doesn't like this school, she's unlikely to like another. I have spoken with her teacher who I feel understands it but obviously has 30 kids to sort out so can't work miracles. My daughter is falling behind in maths and in intervention groups and I just feel this makes things worse, not better. She has to do the thing she hates more and gets taken out of the afternoon lessons (which she enjoys)!

Do you have any ideas about how to help her through it? I feel so woefully unequipped for this!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
chocciechocface · 20/11/2025 14:34

It’s hard, isn’t it. When my children’s confidence has been knocked by school, I’ve tried to pick it up at home. Find out what they’re doing in class and what she’s struggling with. Her teacher is a better source of info than she is. There are lots of amazing fun ways to do maths and I found I’d try different things into it finally clicked. But it must be fun and there must be no pressure. More a conversation and practicing together. She should enjoy the time with you. When her confidence grows then hopefully school won’t be something she dreads. It doesn’t end: instead of times tables I’m now having to teach myself chemistry. YouTube is brilliant.

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