Let children stay off school when baby born?

[hebri]

Did you let your kids have a day off school once baby was born?

I’m having a baby next Friday. I have an 8 & 5 year old. They will likely have half of Saturday and then Sunday at home with the baby.

I think eldest will want to go to school on the Monday, but 5 year old will definitely want to stay at home with the baby.

Would you let your kids have a day off school to bond and whatnot?

No of course not, what are you thinking?

It’s a no from me

No
Kids of that age will not be interested in a baby

Seems I’m going to be a minority of 1 here, but yes I let DS stay home the day after I came home with baby DD. He was 8 so a little older and not needing hands on caring or entertaining in the same way as a younger child. He was quite anxious about the baby and so this was a little way of reassuring him and showing him he was still important.
He’s 13 now and doesn’t seem to view school and optional from 1 day off.
I don’t retreat the decision.

personally I’d sent them both to school, but what I absolutely wouldn’t do it keep one honest and send one in, you’d be setting up all sorts of weird dynamics.

Mine only had 1 day off. It was the day I was giving birth as my husband was with me and DD had to go to a childminder who does drop-offs and pick-ups at a different school.

My dd was interested in her baby sibling but school is only 8.30 to 3.30 (or similar). The kids have all afternoons, evenings, and weekends to bond with the baby.

It's not like the baby will change on a daily basis... from a 5yo's pov, once they've spent half an hour with the baby, it's just more of the same after that!

Why not get a photo printed out of the baby for the kids to show their teachers. The teachers might even get them to write a card for the baby or some other activity to mark the occasion.

Absolutely not. You are creating really bad habits for the future.

I didn't, routine is important and (maybe just my 5yo) the 5 year old needs attention and activity at home which I couldn't really offer all day recovering from a c section.

Nope, school as normal. They'll see baby when they get home

I can’t see why you would, no.

Mine would have stayed off if ds had been born on a weekday because I was having a home birth and we decided we’d have her there for the birth. Also really practically if I was in labour and needed Dh with me, there would have been no one to take her or go collect her from school (10 minutes drive each way plus parking and waiting around, at least 30 minutes).

As it turned out, he was born on a Saturday, so all she missed was a friend’s birthday party (which 8 years later, she still hasn’t forgotten he ruined for her 🤣).

Honestly, getting a new baby sibling is exciting for like all of 2 hours and then they’re bored and would rather be with their friends. Dd went back to school as normal that Monday. The last thing I needed was a 5 year old at home and bored when I was feeding and sleeping too.

Thanks all.

I think I will play it by ear.

You’re probably right in that I will want a break after the weekend with everyone anyway! I do look forward to my freedom on a Monday anyway, so I imagine I will be looking forward to the peace and quiet (even though we know it isn’t peace and quiet 🤣).

I just know my youngest would love it. She is so, so loving and caring and will want to help non stop.

I won’t mention anything about staying at home and then will see how dead I feel by Monday morning!

Nope get them packed off to school, let them share their baby news.

If they stayed off on the Monday would you be planning on them being off all week?
The baby is here for good. Life will have to return to the new normal at some point.

My youngest was born during school holidays, but no chance would I have kept oldest of if I could have avoided it.

No, it wouldn’t even occur to me.

Send them off as usual telling them ‘you can tell your teacher and friends all about new baby’

If Monday, why not Tuesday? Why not the rest of the week? What’s so special about that Monday when they’ve already had the weekend to bond with the baby?

I couldn't physically get my girl to school when her sibling was born so she did have a day off and it was so lovely. The attendance officer came round too, saw me with the baby, I told her it's literally my first mobile day since the birth, and she said we'll see her tomorrow, congratulations.

She goes to her dad's for contact so she would have missed some time so this solidified my decision. I managed taxis on the school run for a couple of weeks after that. Cost me the earth.

I just know my youngest would love it. She is so, so loving and caring and will want to help non stop.

That's nice, and my dd is like that too, but I don't think this is an instinct to encourage too much. Your dd should not be helping to look after her sibling at the detriment of her own education and peer friendships. It's a slippery slope. Your dd is not a mini parent to her baby sibling. She has her own life to live which includes daily school.

Nope! 6 dc and they always went to school as normal when the new baby arrived.

Congratulations and Good luck for the birth 💐

Don't be ridiculous!

Detriment to her education?
Slippery slope...
Mini parent?

Its a day off, Ops not said shes planning on strapping the baby on to her older dc and leaving them to get on with it!
🙄

Hi OP, personally I'd definitely not let them stay off school for several reasons:

• Having a new baby is a huge change to the norm/routine, and whilst exciting can also feel unsettling for siblings (especially as your 5 year old hasn't experienced what it's like to have a new baby in the family before). Going to school actually offers her a safe, predictable and containing part of her routine. (Reminds her that in a time of change, something is still "normal").

• In general I personally don't agree with teaching a child that if they don't fancy going to school then they don't have to. It would probably be hard for a 5 year old to understand if they're allowed to stay home on the Monday then why is Tuesday any different etc?

• You know what having a newborn is like, and while I'm sure we all experience it differently you don't know at this point how physically recovered you'll be from birth (or not as was my experience). I have a 5 year old myself, and while she is becoming more independent there's no way she'd happily tolerate my attention not being on her for large chunks of the day - and you'll understandably want to be focussing on your newborn and yourself too.

I think your idea comes from a kind place but honestly in your position I'd be sending both kids off to school on Monday. Hope the arrival of your new bubba goes smoothly 😊

Op whats your logic are you think it will be Monday before you are home?

Because I might think differently if Baby was born at the start of the week and you werent home until Thursday or something. Kids off Thusday / Friday.

Of course not.

She can have after school and the weekends to care for her sibling. Send her to school. Why give her the option when it's a school day. Hence needing to go to school.

Absolutely not.

Straight back to school! But baby did come and do the school run by three days old (straightforward birth and easy at that time of year).