How do you find time to have fun at the weekend?

[oneplusone]

I have been feeling for a while that our weekends are all work and no play. We seem to spend the whole time doing household chores, cooking, gardening etc etc and yes, in between we do play with the DC's, pop out to the park etc, but I don't feel we ever really do things as a family.

I think unless we plan that we'll have a day out as a family at the weekend every weekend will go by without us really doing anything.

What do you all do at the weekend? We don't have family nearby and friends are a bit thin on the ground as we've just moved to a new area and it's taking time to make friends. So usually it's just me, DH, DD and DS, all on our lonesome at home.

We always have at least one day if not two out at the weekend. At the zoo, farm, picnic, beach, fair etc etc

That's what weekends are for... Anything else can be done during the week.

Wulfricsmummy
But if your children still nap, that must mean they are small enough to need constant supervision.
It will get better when they are older because you'll be able to get on with stuff while they are happily playing alone (as long as you learn to leave them to resolve their own fights). Eg We manage to clean up the kitchen while DCs are having a bit of a play after evening meal. It used to be something that we had to deal with after they had gone to bed.

Usually our house is a bit of a tip by Monday but I don't work on Mondays and so clean it right through then. DD is 4 and I have arrangements with two friends that the DDs all play together - take it in turns which house and I find I can clean while they are here if it is my turn and DD is occupied so I don't feel guilty.

We almost always have something on at a weekend and DH plays golf on Saturdays. So this Saturday it was dancing then swimming then birthday party then football registration. Then on Sunday PIL visited and came with us to the Scout (DS is a beaver) gala. I did do some gardening on Sunday am and we got the DC out on their bikes - trying to get DS confident on a two-wheeler.

wishingchair - i have searched and searched for a cleaner but i cant find one that would only do a couple of hours a fortnight like yours does. Who do u have? (if u dont mind me asking )

i am a single parent who works full time, so i find it a struggle on weekends although i'm getting better at it.

i usually do some chores during weekdays, hovering one day, washing on fridays. i have even done food shopping over the course of 3 lunch times (v funny looks form work collegues).

i try and wake real early sat to do the shopping wthout getting in anybodys way with my pram, then it's home, put baby down for a nap, prepare meals for the week while she sleeps.

we always visit people on weeksends, mostly friends with kids, and sundays are spent with my sister.

its taken a while to get to the point where i am tarting to feel in control but we're getting there

Diverting the thread a little here - kids and chores - who does what, how often and at what age? It's a bit of a bone of contention in our house as I think my stepson at the age of 12 should really be helping out a lot more... he generally expects everything to be done for him and moans at even the smallest task...

'Happiness' by Richard Layard is about what underlies happiness, the causes, where in the world it is perceived as highest and the ways to achieve it yourself.

How money helps, but time spent is more effective.

Work/life balance is all part of this.

In studies of happiness levels, most people's happiness increases when a child is born, but returns to normal once they are about two years of age!

It has helped me to prioritise what i and my family want and enjoy life more.

May I suggest a Bat & Ball picnic. Send out a text message to all your friends. Get DH to take kids out to do out of the house chores. Then prepare the picnic and tidy the house in one mad blitz. It's amazing how much you can get done when you have a dead line. Find a park you can get to by bus and just go. I was a bit nervous that no one would turn up. It is also amazing how many close friends and family will turn up and make you feel loved. If you shy it is risky but do it anyway.

I think I must be so inefficient- have 3 kids (12,10 and 3) and work 3 days a week and seem to be constantly washing,ironing,picking up everyone elses clutter . By the time been to work, taken dd to dancing and ds to swimming etc etc and finally got home for good at 8.30ish am whacked and don't have energy to mop floors etc after they have gone to bed ! Kids do nothing and like snuffkin's kids moan at the smallest of chores. How do people live in clutter free houses ? It is one of life's mysteries - do their kids not play or do they stand over them 24hrs a day saying move this move that? The only way my house stays tidy is to constantly nag kids and then they make life miserable by rebelling and moaning - any tips anyone ?

Blackrock, thanks.

Aiden, I have always done shopping in my lunch hour since having children. (I used to do it on the way home from work before.) No fridge at work but the local butchers and fishmongers prepare my order and take payment when I have time, then keep it in the fridge until just after work so it only takes a couple of minutes.

Tracey, only person I know with children and a clutter free house is constantly chucking things out. I prefer to keep everything (eg bits of packaging that can be recycled for craft activities) but it does make a mess.

We were so stressed with just DD1, our weekends were just like you described, we argued, etc. So made effort from then on to aleways have a day out - usually Sunday, unless weather forecast beeter on sat - has varied with age of kids (now 5 and 3), but formula is anywhere with cafe/playground/duckpinds, short walks - pref s combination - NT properties good - take picnics if need to save money. Beaches/countryside fine, certain childfriendly interactive museums and galleries can kill a bit of rainy day time,save paid-for indoor attractions (like aquariums) for depths of winter. Incidentally, we both used to work full time 9me 3 days now), have no family nearby, but make effort to do essential washing etc in week and only hoover if it's really bad or someone's coming round. Never iron. Never dust. What's the point?

We have this problem, but also partly as DH is quite a stay-at-home person. Can't really blame him as he is away during the week. BUT our solution - still in trial phase - and built up VERY gradually. We moved in the autumn to a large house (with about 60 stairs!)and had loads to do when we first moved, now, there is a just a very long list of indoor and outdoor jobs. At first i did the cleaning myself and was knackered all the time. Then we got a cleaner for 3 hours, and she was good but not nice. Then i advertised in the local polish shops and got someone a bit cheaper and much nicer for 4 hours. That was a huge help. We are pretty clutter free (due to different levels and only 1 child) but kitchen and hall are ankle-breaking areas. Weekends still full of jobs though. So then i decided to try the Saturday is for jobs, and Sunday for family outings formula or even just family time at home or locally & very slowly and with lots of hiccups that seems to be starting to work. Also takes quite a while to get to know a new area if you don't have much time. Never iron either but can't stand dust. Agree about picnics.

I have just returned to work after 9months maternity.

Hubby works splits, so relishes his time off to hang out with our little boy and when I m not at work, I am busy catching up with everything else I need to get done, or taking the little one to playgroups, or seeing friends and family.

Soo.... after much deliberation.. we have just invested in a cleaner! 2 hours every 2 weeks!! and I must say, I feel so much better.

We tend to keep on top of everything in between as we want the cleaner to be able to get as much done in as short amount of time as possible! (so we dont have to pay too much out),

Thoroughly recommend it - give a much better work/play balance!