No. 2 arriving soon - any practical tips on how to manage?

[mrsmacleod]

Hello, DS2 should be with us any day and I'm getting a little bit anxious as to how I'm going to juggle a newborn and a 2.5yr toddler. Not so much on the introducing the new sibling, as I've found lots of ideas for that from friends and mumsnet, but would really appreciate tips - from those in a similar situation - on how I might manage things on a day-to-day basis. Should I be drawing up meal plans for the next 6 months? Or maybe I should be applying for a loan to pay for a housekeeper?!

I have a 2.5 year gap.
DS2 is now 16 weeks and we've settled back to normal life ok!

My tips would be...
If both are crying prioritise the toddler!
Dont feel bad about putting the TV on or a DVD - its necessary in the early days!!
Get out every day once you feel up to it.
Try and keep the older ones routines going in terms of toddler groups and bath/bed time etc

Bath time/Bed time was the bit I struggled with most. If your DH can get home in time to help with that then make sure you rope him in!
If not, then once you feel confident enough try bathing them together and then feed the little one while you read the toddler bed time stories - thats what I have settled on as the best night routine.

Good luck!

What quaranta says is absolutely right ... they both have each other and that is really special. DD1 is 5 and goes to sleep with her head under the covers as she gets scared. If her and DD2 (nearly 2) are in the same room she doesn't cos her sister is there with her. She's been like this since DD2 was a tiny baby ... not like she'd be any practical help in the face of bedtime monsters but her being there must be a comfort to DD1. So what I'm saying is they both depend on each other. It's lovely.

Loads of great tips here. I would add:
Some things you need to get done can be done (albeit more slowly) in parallel with toddler - eg. give them pan/wooden spoon/dry pasta while you cook, give them dustpan & brush or cloth while you clean up. Some love dragging laundry in and out of baskets (or sitting in baskets). I'm guilty of seeing everything from the grown-up view and occasionally remember that almost anything can be made into a game, thereby often avoiding a confrontation.

I'd second the "get Mr Tesco to deliver your shopping" but then add that when you remember the items you've forgotten to order, that's the perfect excuse to stretch toddlers legs and go round the shops slowly, play on the Bob the Builder machine etc (that's your outing for the day!). If well behaved they can choose something to buy (best bet for getting my ds to eat lots of fruit is get him to choose & pay for it in the market).

And unfortunately - if you can't sleep when the baby does in the day, you will need to be disciplined and sleep in the evening, at the expense of time with dh in the beginning.

Enjoy, it's wonderful seeing the two together!

The most important thing is to remember the thought of doing a task is much harder than actually doing it.

You will be fine. Pat yourself on the back each time you've completed a task for the first time.

Good luck.

Thank you all for your great tips - I know it's going to be hard but so it's so nice to hear that it's going to get easier and that they might just start to appreciate each other at some point.

I've not read the thread but the one thing that really helped me was to get a CD player for DS1's room so on those nights when I'm putting them both to bed I can leave DS1 with a CD story while feeding DS2 and putting him to bed. The added bonus was that sometimes DS1 would fall asleep listening

Can anyone offer any advice to me???? Have 2 years old Ds and 4 week old DD - who cannot get to sleep on her own and wants complete silence to even attempt it....which needless to say DS is not a fan of! I have only twice managed to get her to sleep in order to get him bathed and in bed (in 4 weeks!) and I'm starting to lose the plot a bit!

We are fine during the day as we are out and about and she falls asleep in the buggy or car...it is the "dinner, bath, bad" bit where the wheels fall off and all hell breaks loose. He is tired so needs more attention or becomes naughty and she needs to sleep so reacts badly to his increased volume and me having to put her down before she's dropped off.

Anyone else have a similare problem or know what to do?????