I’m not sure how to feel.

[Rach7291]

I have a 17mo DD. I always wanted another child, just not yet. I’ve found out i’m pregnant and I have such mixed feelings. It took 7 years to conceive DD so i’m in alot of shock. I was happy when I saw the positive, but now I feel so sad. I have no friends and family around. Its just me and DH. I had awful PND for the first 8 months of DD’s life and it was the worst time. I feel like i’m finally getting my life back and DD is the best kid! I’m enjoying being a parent so much and I am so scared of my life changing again. Anyone else felt like this? Any advice is welcome please!

I was in a similar situation. Accidental pregnancy, wasn't even sure I wanted a second. Felt complete panic throughout my first trimester.

She's here now and yes it's hard and yes sometimes I think how much easier life would be with one. But she's lovely and we're coping!

If you want a second anyway I'd go for it. Might as well get the baby stage over and done with, and there are benefits of a small age gap.

The good thing is, this time you’ll be more prepared. You can ask your DH to look for signs of you slipping. Sometimes ots difficult to tell yourself.

You can also ask your MW what you experienced before and ask to be referred to the Perinatal MH Team, if they have one.

You can talk to the Pandas Foundation, which is run by Women who have experienced PNI.

And you can ask your HV if there are any local groups for Women who are at risk of PNI.

It’s alao perfectly normal to want another DC, then think WTF have I done when the news of a second PG sinks in. It doesn’t mean that you’ll be unwell this time, jist tgat you appreciate that things will change for all of you but that’s not necessarily a bad thing.

Whatever you decide though, you will have made the right decision at that time