How did you get your 1 year old to be a good eater?

[ZaHaK]

My DD just turned 1 year. She just whinges in the high chair. Stares at her plate. Picks things up here and there.
She will eat if I feed her and distract her with songs. Otherwise she just whinges to get out.
Weaning was going so well until she got 6 teeth in one go at 11 months old.

What's wrong with singing and some toys?

My son needed a lot of distraction at that age while eating. He hadn't gotten the hang of BLW so wanted me to feed him but he wasn't so amazed by the look of food like he was at first. I got some high chair toys, sang songs etc. Now at 15 months (so not long at all) he wants to feed himself finally so not as much distraction is needed anymore.

The suction high chair toys are brilliant. I had a few on rotation.

Oh okay, I thought she should be feeding herself quite well now and shouldn’t have to resort to singing songs to get her to eat.
I honestly thought she would be at least eating most of it with her hands at this age.

Some babies really take to BLW. Some don't.

I started with BLW since it's all the rage but he couldn't be arsed 😅 i posted on MN about high chair toys and some posters insisted i was creating bad habits and toys are terrible at meal times. But it was just a phase.

Your child doesn’t need to be a good eater

as long as they have energy and are active and alert and gradual gaining weight that’s fine

a good eater by the way is just one that will try lots of thing

I have no idea if this helped or not but basically we ate with DD as often as possible as if she was having the meal with us, and let her nick anything off our plates and put it in her mouth (within reason!) she is 3 now, eats well and will still try most things. She had the most dreadful reflux though - think puke on the hour every hour almost 24/7 until she was weaned (no allergies) so I do suspect that she was fascinated by having a full tummy and not have it immediately come back up!

We completely took the pressure off by sitting them on our laps and letting them eat off our plates, they didn’t eat huge amounts at 1 but played with a lot of food and copied us

My DD is a great eater now but was definitely a bit slower than her peers to really get to eat confidently (eg. She is 20 months and I still wouldn't give her raw carrots, an still cut things like grapes really small etc.). She tries everything and feeds herself with a spoon or fork with very little mess now. Cleans her plate every meal and says thank you 😅

I mostly spoon fed her until she was about 11 months. We almost always eat the same thing, but with hers served in a way she can manage. If I have something different, I let her taste off my spoon (or when she was younger off my finger). She never liked to get her hands dirty in the food so baby led weaning wasn't very successful.

We kept dinner time short and stress free. We never had toys or music at the table but I would chat with her and then as soon as she started to slow down or lose interest, dinner was over. If still hungry later then milk top up.

That approach worked really well for us - to err on side of caution. Emphasis on trying rather than eating. Always happy to spoon feed, especially if it was messy. They hit the age where they WANT to do everything themselves anyway, so really don't worry.

People talk about how blw is so important for hand eye coordination and fine motor skills and I honestly eye roll. Dinner time lasts for 15 mins max. You have the whole day to do activities that support their development.

There is no right way. Just go at your own pace and follow her lead.

kids can go through a “hungry phase” of eating lots for a couple of months and then a “not hungry phase” of picking at food and barely eating. Keep things calm and low key and she will be back to a hungry phase in a bit.

The singing and playing goes on for quite a long time in my experience, especially if you have an energetic child who would rather do anything but sit down and eat.

In particularly annoying phases we would eat on the floor from a 'picky plate'.

The baseline was at the table as a family though.

We don't need to do any of that now at 2 and 3yo. We just chat, although sometimes there are monster trucks on the table 🙃.

Ah okay, I thought I was creating bad habits by singing or feeding for a 12 month old.

The social media kids seem to eat all their food without any distractions! 🙃

Three kids, all very different experiences of eating. Though I thought I was a perfect parent with DS1, I just got lucky and DS2 was a huge education. Keep it relaxed and you’ll get there in the end and stay off social media. No one is going to fill their child on a bad day.

I fed my two the same food the same way. Never did BLW did purees and baby food till they were old enough to be feeding themselves. My DD 16, eats practically everything and will try anything which we love. My DS 14, is not anywhere near adventurous and has a much more annoyingly, limited menu of food he will eat . So whatever you do will probably change as they get older.

The same way meaning? Singing and spoon feeding them? How old when they fed themselves?

Social media has made me feel like my 12 month old should be eating lots of food, by herself with no distractions.

If you have access to a sand pit or sand table give her some cups and spoons to play with. My second child was much better with the spoon after that.
Otherwise, it’s related to their character and development to some extent and you can’t really change it. My good eater was a good eater from 6 months and my bad eater just wasn’t interested until 18 months.
Improvement wasn’t gradual, he just started eating well one day, so don’t get frustrated because you think you should see progress.

If she’s 12 months and not really interested in food, is she night weaned yet @ZaHaK?

Yes she’s night weaned.
She wakes up about 7ish, and even then not really interested in milk or food. She doesn’t have breakfast until 9ish.

Only a month ago, she was crying to be fed upon wake up.

Get off social media, it’s all tweaked fakery designed to make us feel bad.

Ok so of she’s night weaned, how much milk does she have in the day and which kind?

She turned 1 a week ago and yesterday had 16oz of cows milk. 4 for morning nap, 4 for afternoon nap and 8 for bedtime.

Ok so that’s a bit over what she should be having which is 10.5 Floz/300 ml.

will you be dropping the morning nap soon and the milk just before it?

Exactly this.

I thought the recommend amount is 16oz??

I will drop the milk yes and just give some in a cup with breakfast.

Don't stress about the amount she is eating; if she had been eating well previously she will go back to that when she realises her teeth no longer hurt, but if you pile on the pressure, she is less likely to - toddlers eat as much as they need generally. I would eat with her when possible, and engage her in how the food sounds, or feels etc. rather than trying to push her to eat it.
Check out solids starts app/website for some great tips for picky eaters
Playing with toys and distraction etc. make it more likely that she will choke on something she's eating as she isn't giving it her full attention.

Also, make sure her high chair has a footrest, sometimes little ones can feel really uncomfortable without one as it's quite hard to engage their core to sit up to eat throughout the entire meal with their feet dangling.

Social media is BS. Of course people are going to show their babies shoving everything down their throats. A baby refusing food or screaming their head off doesn't play by the perfect life rule.

My two were still a pain in the arse when It came to eating. I remember having to go into the next room and do choo Choo train with my ds or he wouldn't eat anything. And they ate in front of the TV a lot so I could distract them and shove a spoon in. I remember two whole weeks when my DD wouldn't eat anything other than petis filou yoghurts. I was tearing my hair out thinking she would never eat again. I can't actually remember when they started eating by themselves my ds is 14 so it seems like a lifetime ago.

I put lots of things that were easy to pick up & bitesize on a plate. Lots of colours and then played 'One for mummy, one for ds'

cheese, ham, beetroot, half cherry tomatoes, half grapes, half tangerine segments, bread sticks, pieeces of pitta

I picked a lot of it off the floor 😀