Opinions on age

[purplerain270]

Wanting kind but genuine thoughts on age of having a child. Is 22 too young, Is 40 too old? Please give reasons, possible personal experiences.

Whatever is right is extremely personal. You shouldn't have a baby just because of age.

Choosing the man who will be the father of your children is the biggest and most important decision you'll ever make. It will affect everything for the next 20 years. So 22 is not great as most won't have met their long life partner by then.

Equally, 40 is not great for age reasons.

So in my opinion, the best time is when you're settled. But be aware of clock ticking and date intentionally in your late 20s. Don't fuck about with guys that aren't good enough.

If you’ve got the financial, social and health resources to have a baby and raise a child, it’s a perfectly fine time to do it.

It depends on the person. I wouldn’t have been mature enough to have kids at 22.

My personal cut off was 35 and i’m glad I stuck to it.

How long is a piece of string. For me I’d say anything from 22-40 for the first child would have been OK but finding the right man was far more crucial. As it happens I had my kids at 25, 27 and 32 (all same DH!)

It’s such a personal decision, unique to every family’s circumstances.

I had mine VERY young. I was married at 19, and pregnant with my first baby a couple of weeks later. I’d just turned 20 when DC1 was born. DC2 followed a month after my 22nd birthday. DC3 followed when I was 24.
It was so hard when they were all little - I had no sleep and was completely fried the entire time.
But now they are older (I’m in my early 30’s now) I’m glad I had them so young and so close together. They are super close as siblings - particularly DCs 2 & 3, they are the best of friends.
I’ll be 38 when my eldest child turns 18, and it sounds selfish, but by the time they are all adults, I’ll still be young enough to have my own life outside of being a parent.
I’ve reached that weird point now (it got particularly bad when my youngest started school) where I feel like maybe I want to have one more baby…..but then I remember how good we’ve got it right now and snap out of it. My DCs are at an age where they are a lot more independent, and can do so much for themselves, so I really want to go back to nappies, breastfeeding and sleepless nights? I don’t think I do 🫣

It really doesn’t matter what anyone thinks. You’re the one having it. Whenever you are financially, mentally, emotionally ready. When your partner is also ready and you both decide it’s want you want to do and you both know you can depend and rely on each other without resentment or one person doing everything. That could be 25 for some or 45 for others. It’s nobody’s business but yours.

I had mine at 36 and 44. If I’d known I’d love them as much as I do and I want to see them for as long as I can, I’d have had them at 22. Having said that, young parents can die young and older parents can live to a good age.