Picky toddler help and ideas

[Tired889]

My 3.5 year old has been picky from the start of weaning. He’s improved with time and now eats something in every food group (if you include hidden) but we seem to have a new phase where we’re starting to drop foods again - it’s making me panic! I also feel like I’m stuck in a rut of offering the same things. Any suggestions of meal ideas would be helpful, thanks!

We always eat dinner together. Never force anything. There are only a couple of meals we can all eat together (bolognese, risotto). Most meals we manage to do a variation of e.g we have curry, he’ll have the rice, naan bread & I’ll do an omelette with his (with a blob of curry on his plate, that gets ignored). Or we used to be able to have teriyaki chicken and rice but pick all the veg out and serve separated on his plate but he now says he doesn’t like chicken, which has massively limited our list of meals we can easily adapt.

Meals he accepts:
Bolognese
Hidden veg & red lentil (blended) pasta
“Pesto” pasta (mashed broccoli into the shop bought pesto)
Cheese omelette and rice
Sausages/chicken nuggets/fish fingers, chips & beans
Jacket potato, cheese & beans
Meatballs & tomato spaghetti
Beef burgers
Broccoli, leek & courgette risotto (hidden veg)
Bacon carbonara
Broccoli & cheese puff pastry pinwheels

He has tomatoes, cucumber & raw red pepper on the side of almost all meals as his “veg”. Although now saying he doesn’t like pepper anymore.

Now that he won’t eat chicken, the only meat he will eat is processed, which I don’t love 😩

Any ideas based on what he likes would be useful. Thanks!

He doesn’t need to eat meat but if he likes processed make your own beef burgers or chicken nuggets ( ok a bit of a faff but not that hard)

ignore him “not liking” that can mean don’t fancy it, hit bored of it, or chancing what might be offered instead if mummy gets stressed

as long as he is healthy, not losing weight, lots of energy, don’t worry

I’m not surprised he doesn’t want a curry. What about roast dinner? My DDs loved a good roast and it was the first meal my non eater ate! What about bean and veg casserole? What about him choosing food in a shop? Take him somewhere exciting. Let him see you cooking.

Make bolognese into shepherds pie. What about making a quiche? Fish and chips? Dc loved this as a treat after evening school club. What about fruit and deserts? What does he have for breakfast? What else have you tried?

Don’t limit what you eat. Show him the rest of you enjoy food. Chicken pasta? Does he know all the foods? Just add cheese to everything if he doesn’t like most meats. Although he’s probably just winding you up if he ate the foods before.

@OhDear111 He hates a roast. Will only eat the potatoes & Yorkshire pudding. Won’t even have gravy (shameful, I love gravy!)

A bean and veg casserole might be a good idea but I’d probably have to blend the veg before adding the beans. Might try that though. Thanks ☺️

Unfortunately he absolutely hates mashed potato so shepherds/cottage pie is a no go. Likes all other forms of potato. We tried cottage pie last night as it’s mince and he eats bolognese. We dished it up with the mash but also served some cubed potatoes on the side. He wouldn’t even try the cottage pie, including the mince part. A quiche is a good idea too. Feel like he’ll turn his nose up as it’ll look “different” but worth a shot! I love a quiche.

He’s pretty good with fruit luckily. Loves strawberries, banana, apple, pear, oranges, melon, grapes & kiwi. For breakfast he normally has porridge with peanut butter & ground flax/chia seeds which he loves or Weetabix. We don’t tend to have desert regularly but obviously loves all the chocolate if it’s ever about. He likes Greek yoghurt too.

We still eat a big variety of meals cooked from scratch, so he at least sees us enjoy a range of food but he just has his variations of those things (e.g just the rice, just the potatoes, a different sauce etc) or extras on the side that I know he’ll eat like omelette or nuggets. I hate the idea of him going to bed hungry (and he wakes up earlier if he does) so we often give him a snack of peanut butter toast, a banana or a homemade sugar free banana & oat muffin before bed.

We’ve tried couscous, which he hates. He won’t touch a stew, doesn’t like tuna or salmon. He used to an eat a chicken tagine with rice (blended veg) but hasn’t eaten that the last couple of times. Will just pick out the noodles of a stir fry, depending on if he likes the sauce. Can’t think what other meals there are 😆

Honestly, that is a big variety of foods. Loads of fruit and veg, protein (eggs, fish, meatballs, ), carbs (bread, pasta, potato). And lots of home cooked things too.

Please don't worry about it. He's eating loads of different stuff. I wouldn't say he's picky at all!

In my opinion that is a really good list of foods / meals. I wouldn’t worry and would go on as you are. Putting a small amount of other foods on the side of what they will already eat is the way to go.

I think it’s a pretty balanced diet but has annoyance factors! My DM used to make potato patties from mash and fry them! We liked Bolognese with them. It’s annoying when they did eat a good variety and then stop and a battleground isn’t good for anyone.

You are doing really well! If he won’t eat chicken how is he with paneer? You can make a lot of tasty curries, just remember to reduce salt and chile.
if he likes lentils I found with my three I could make a big pot of daal which could be adapted into soup or lentil patties. They loved the patties with plenty of raita and chopped cold bread.
Nut roast was always popular you can hide anything in that! Serve with plain rice, a veg curry sauce and mango chutney.
Does he eat fish? Cod or halibut cheeks have no bones, are so easy to dip in tempura batter and fry. I serve them to any children who come to my house with a dipping sauce. Always disappear quickly.
The cheeks are also handy to cook in a white or cheese sauce with mash on top for a quick and easy fish pie.
Polenta is a good one you could make his with thd chicken stock and lots of herbs and you two eat thd chicken. If dries up nicely next day when thick and mixed with cheese.
He may not be as gullible as my children but I used to serve myself any food they said they did not like and say this was mummy’s and not for them! Strange how suddenly everyone wanted some!

That’s a really decent diet for a fussy eater. I wouldn’t stop offering him things he’s happily ate before though. Just serve him a smaller portion of it and a bit more of the bits on his plate you know he will eat

Things we eat regularly that he might like:
-orzotto
-mexican rice and beans
-lentil and ham or lentil and veg soup (blended for fussy eaters) with bread and and butter
-hidden veg mac & cheese

Oh and homemade fishcakes maybe?

Google "Chelsea Winter sneaky rissoles" for another great hidden veg recipe.
Does he help you cook? I know it's even more time consuming with a little assistant, but can help them to be more confident trying foods they've helped to make. My little one loves making pizza bases and tomato sauce from scratch (large batch to freeze!).
But honestly, sounds like he's doing well with his food so well done you!

I found the book War and Peas by Jo Cormack really helpful with dealing with picky eating. It’s a short easy read.

I think you're being over ambitious tbh. Most kids this age are a bis fussy and from that list I count:

Protein: beef, chicken, pork (sausages) fish, eggs, lentils and peanut butter.

Carbs: pasta, rice, bread, oats, potato and pastry.

Fruit and Veg: loads!

Dairy: cheese and yoghurt

It's great! I'd take the stress off yourself. This is a healthy, balanced diet. It's annoying he won't eat exactly the same as you and DH, but he's 3.5! Keep offering him what you're having and putting stuff on his plate he will eat and eventually his tastes will develop.

Aaah, I feel your pain. This was exactly me and my oldest. He’s heading into the teenage years now and, although still definitely on the picky side he’s eating so, so much more. It really started to improve when he was 9 and the growth spurt started. The best pieces of advice I was given are:

1. As long as he’ll eat something from each food group, don’t panic (I know the gripping fear when they start to reject yet another thing)
2. Don’t turn food into a battle
3. Always put at least one safe food on the plate
4. Just keep on offering different things again and again in a low pressure way. No big deal if they don’t eat it.
5. You have be really patient but his palette should hopefully eventually extend.

We eat a lot of meals with the same base and slightly different toppings. Picky plates, fajitas/tacos, jacket potatoes, noodles.

i know it gets boring eating the same things again and again but the list of things you’ve put that he does eat will keep him healthy and growing strong. It’s definitely not a bad list. Hang in there Mama! I reckon you’re doing great.