I’m really struggling with my ex at the moment and just wanted to see if anyone has been through something similar.
We have two children (ages 4 and 6), and I also have a 5-month-old with my husband. My ex and I were together from a very young age, and our relationship was abusive, which is part of why I now want to keep contact strictly about the children.
He’s a police officer who works shifts (6 on, 4 off), and our court order gives him custody of the kids on two of his four days off. The problem is that the order doesn’t specify how much notice he needs to give me for those days. Sometimes he gives just 24 hours’ notice, other times a week and if I’ve already made plans, he accuses me of breaching the order, even though he’s breached it himself several times.
I’ve tried to be reasonable, but it’s becoming exhausting and stressful. I feel like he uses the situation to control me rather than prioritise the children.
Has anyone had experience co-parenting with someone who works shifts? How did the court or mediator handle the notice issue? I’d really appreciate hearing from anyone who’s managed to find a fairer arrangement