Feel like I’m not a good parent

[ManoharDash]

Money’s tight, bills keep going up, kids always need something new for school or clubs or whatever. I feel like I’m constantly saying no to them and then feeling horrible about it.
My 9 year old’s been going on about needing new trainers cos “everyone’s got them”, and my 12 year old wants to join another club that costs a fortune. I want to say yes, I really do, but I’m also panicking every time I check the bank account. Feels like we’re barely keeping our heads above water.
I keep thinking maybe I’m doing it all wrong, maybe they’ll remember me as the boring mum who always said no. I just don’t know how people are coping right now. Anyone else feeling like this?

Don’t feel horrible, it’s tough right now.
Try Vinted for the trainers and say no to the club or swap a different club so they have a choice.

You’re not a bad parent at all — you’re a parent who’s trying to keep the household afloat in a really tough time. Most families are feeling the squeeze right now, even if they don’t talk about it. Kids wanting things is normal, but it doesn’t mean you’re failing if you can’t say yes to everything.
What they’ll remember isn’t the trainers or the clubs — it’s feeling safe, cared for and supported. Saying no because you’re protecting the essentials is responsible parenting, not being “boring.”
If you can, be honest with them in a simple way about budgets and priorities, and maybe find lower-cost alternatives together. But please don’t beat yourself up — you’re doing exactly what a good parent does.

Thanks, I’ll try that and have a chat with the kids about it.

We all have to say no. Or most parents. Cost of living crisis.

Yeah you’re right, everyone’s having to say no more these days. I just always want to give them the best I can, but it’s getting really hard without stressing about money all the time.

Don't think so; you just do your best.