19mo not walking or talking yet - should I be worried?

[CozyNovemberMum]

hi just wanted some advice really cos im worrying a bit. my youngest is 19 months and hes still not walking or saying any proper words. he bum shuffles everywhere and will pull up on the sofa but wont let go, just cries if i try to get him to walk holding my hands. he makes noises and babbles loads but no actual words yet apart from maybe mama sometimes but not sure if he means me or just saying it.

hv said hes fine when she came a couple months ago and said hes just “taking his time” but everyone i know with babies same age or younger theirs are running about and talking loads. i keep seeing videos online and it makes me feel like im doing something wrong tbh.

he eats barely anything, mostly just yoghurts or banana and sometimes toast. hes always constipated too and weve had lactulose off the gp but it only helps a bit. he still wakes a lot at night and just wants to be held all the time. i cant put him down without him crying lately and its so hard cos im quite far on in pregnancy now and my back is killing me half the time.

idk if i should push for another hv visit or wait it out a bit longer? dont want to seem like im overreacting but i just feel like hes behind now. should he be walking and saying proper words by this age?

sorry if this is daft question im just worried.

I think you should see your GP, not necessarily because anything is wrong, but HV's aren't exactly known for their stunning expertise and advice.

I think what you're saying about then food intake adds a level of complexity that a doctor should take a look at.

Oh you've seen the GP, what did they say? Id be looking for a referral. Again not because something is definitely wrong, but I'd want a bit more investigation.

Apparently its common for bum shufflers to not walk until much later, coz they can already get around whilst looking up and carrying things. Also I've found banana makes my little one constipated, so maybe thats not helping? X

thanks yeah we saw gp a few weeks back cos of his constipation and i did mention the walking/talking too but they just said hes probably fine and to give him time. they didnt really look at him properly though just said to keep doing tummy time and let him cruise round furniture. i dont even think they wrote anything down about it tbh.

he eats so little it worries me more than the walking some days. like he’ll have maybe a yoghurt and half a banana and then refuse everything else. ive tried everything, even the pouches again but he just spits them out. he drinks water and milk fine tho.

i might try ring the hv again and see if she can come out cos hes not changed much since she last came. just feel like they all think im being over the top cos ive got a lot on but i know him best.

I’m sure you’re not doing anything wrong. You are obviously a kind and caring parent. Children are all so different and do things in their own time. That said, if you are worried, you should absolutely push for another HV visit or go to your GP. Even if they just say the same, and tell you to give it time, a parent who is worried about their child should always have the right to an expert view.

There’s a spectrum of development. Mine didn’t walk until 16 months ish but his speech was reasonably developed.

It sounds as if your son is delayed in more than one area so unless there’s a good reason (he’s been ill for instance) then it’s time to go back to the HV and your GP. You’ll get people saying their kid didn’t speak etc until much later which am sure is perfectly true but delays in speech and mobility shouldn’t be ignored on a hope for the best basis.

How much milk is he having? He might be too full up!

I think given the food and speech difficulties, you need to go to the HV and or GP and see if SALT would help, because the problems might be related.

thanks everyone that makes me feel a bit better. didnt realise about bum shufflers taking longer that actually makes sense cos he’s so fast doing it 😂 he never crawled properly just shuffled from about 10 months and now he zooms round the house like that.

he does still have quite a bit of milk tbh, 2 bottles a day and sometimes one in the night if he wakes loads. maybe that is filling him up too much i never thought of that. might try cutting it down a bit and see if he eats more.

yeah i think i will ring hv again and just explain im still worried cos hes not really changing. hes been ill loads too with colds and ear infections so maybe that’s not helped either.

and good point about the banana maybe not helping the constipation, i give him one most days cos it’s one of the few things he’ll eat! will try give him something else instead.

Kiwi is good for constipation and very soft if it's ripe enough.

oh i didnt know that thank you! ive never actually given him kiwi before cos i thought it might be too sharp for him but i’ll get some when i go shop later and see if he’ll try it. hes really funny with new textures but maybe if i mash it up a bit he’ll eat it. worth a try anyway, anything to help him go easier poor thing gets so upset sometimes 😩

One of mine was a bum shuffler and she didn't walk until a week before her 2nd birthday. Absolutely still talk to the medical professionals but try not to worry to much these things usually sort themselves out.