What the hell so we do?

[JollyHostess101]

So my neatly 2.5 year old has developed massive parental preference for husband.

He’s been off work retraining for a while so it’s fine he’s around to do the night wake ups and generally around when she won’t entertain me anywhere near here but it’s starting to take a toll on his studying as this week it’s progressed to her not wanting me at all I can’t get her dressed or a nappy or give her breakfast while he’s trying to catch up on sleep in the mornings!

Its making me feel like a rally shit mum I literally love her to pieces but the constant crying and screaming that I’m not daddy and the go away mummy and swap with daddy and pushing me away is getting to me.

I know she’s not rational and it’s probably just a phase but is there anything I can do? She just screams and screams if I go in and she wants a daddy. She’s currently hollering at the stair gate waiting for him to come down from having a shower!

She's 2.5 - she should understand 'Daddy is busy, so we need to do this together'. What do you do if he isn't in the house?

She’s fine if he’s not in the house!! It more of an issue when she he’s here but not with her if that makes sense!

We honestly thought him being off for a while would be an amazing thing for her rather than him doing 90+ hrs a week in the hospitality industry but this past couple of weeks it feels like it’s bitten me on the arse!

You just have to be firm then.

Daddy is doing something else/daddy is working etc
Just walk away if the tantrumming is too much to actually achieve what you need to - getting dressed etc - and just wait quietly until she has calmed down.

I agree with others you just need to be firm but calm. Make sure he is on board too as if he steps in it undoes it.

I would also do some fun things the two of you while he is in the house doing what he needs to just so she is reminded she can have fun with both of you. Maybe make some cakes for Daddy as a suprise type thing?

Mine had phases like this. Sometimes for me, sometimes for their dad. It is completely normal please don't take it to heart.
Also worth remembering toddlers just absolutely crave attention and at 2.5 they don't really care if it's good or bad attention if that makes sense. So if her screaming for dad causes you to stress and then for her dad to appear then she's getting attention. I know it's hard but try to just ignore it and carry on as if she's not demanding dad. So change her nappy regardless. Sure at times it will be like trying to dress an alligator etc but you really have to try and pay it no attention. It won't do her any harm. You are there dealing with her needs as a loving parent. Try and think of it as if she was screaming to cross a road when a car was coming would I let her do it? Nope. It's kind of similar (just less life threatening obvs)

He needs to get out the house and study somewhere else.

My 14 month old knows when I'm WFH and is an absolute nightmare if I'm in (he has a full time nanny). Everyone else at my office with toddlers comes in every single day, same story, toddlers just know you're in there typing away and won't settle.