Does anyone else hate weekends with their children???

[LMcmahon]

I hate weekends. Endless "im bored", constantly trying to come up with ideas to entertain them which usually ends up in tears.
Cannot ever just stay home because of the constant whining, im boreds and complaining, so we have to go out all day every day at the weekends, no matter the weather, we have to be out, in the rain, snow, whatever. Cannot just spend a day at home, enjoying time together in our home.
Its awful.
Is it just me? Is it just our family that cannot ever just enjoy relaxing together at the weekends?!
Its 9.30 in the morning and i am done. What can i do to get them to just enjoy life without everything being so difficult every minute of every day?!
They are 5 and 7

I think this really ramps up when you have more than one child

Completely agree with this. When DH I and divide and conquer and I just have my eldest (age 5) to deal with it’s so easy. I can give him an hour of uninterrupted attention and that would fill his bucket to then give me half an hour of doing what I needed/wanted to do. If he has a new Lego set I won’t need to do anything with him for hours.

2, especially when one is still a toddler is utter chaos and we definitely get out a lot more to stop it descending into brawls at home. I don’t know why they wind each other up so much. I suspect it’s partly because neither is getting quality attention.

Having a smallholding has been a godsend. As soon as I heard "I'm bored" they'd be mucking out the animal shelter or the chicken coop!

We do not need to entertain kids all day every day. They will not die of boredom.

Right ??
The idea of kids dictating the odds about when we went out and where- esp if a house day was the plan is so alien to me I find it baffling.
If they started playing up while bored and jumping on each other/ fighting / winding each other up down stairs and mithering us, we had a strict in your own rooms- with door shut if need be. Wow betide anyone who came out when it had got to that point.
Rooms were full of books toys games etc , no screens back then although eldest two had TVs I think

Each to their own but the idea of your own kids dictating the odds and getting under your feet /causing stress as ‘bored’ is barmy and so stressful I imagine ??

Yes, that’s the issue. Not children being on tablets and watching YouTube. It’s the parents taking them out and playing with them.

Children do need to self regulate and entertain themselves. That is also on parents to teach them. That also means parent interaction.

We are not going to agree because I find the children need to be bored far too simplistic and an excuse. I don’t disagree it’s sometimes draining but why else have children if you’re not prepared to do the basics?

Everytime they complain they are bored “oh good you have nothing to do help me with the dishwasher” “you can do some hoovering” “folding clothes” etc etc if you offer similarly boring ideas they will find something else to do.

have set times for digital entertainment like tv or ipads so they know they cant always rely on these.

I was lucky in my kids can entertain themselves from a young age, DD costs in books, DS in lego - both enjoy games in the garden.

Yes enrich them but dont be the only source of entertainment. Also have a hobby you can do at home that they are only allowed to interrupt in an emergency.

Im a bit confused, I havnt seen anyone on this thread suggesting never playing with their children, just not entertaining them constantly, have I missed a post?

Mine are 4&6. I honestly find it difficult when DH is away for the day/weekend as there is nobody to take over for 5 minutes just for you to fill your cup back up.

However usually our weekends involve something active in the mornings as a minimum. This weekend was swimming lessons Saturday morning and then in the afternoon DH had to go for a medical test locally so we went together and the kids ran around the playground next door whilst we waited. When we got back he took them to a new cycling park and they were gone a couple of hours doing that. Yesterday we took the kids for a family swim in the morning and then we spent the afternoon chilling in the house. By this point the kids we happy just doing their own thing whilst DH and myself either potted about or caught up on videocalls with family or whatever. Last night I took the kids for a walk around our village with our torches and went to see if anybody else had put Halloween decorations out. We got back just in time for the youngest to get ready for bed. They both were then knackered from the clock changes and slept well last night.

Our kids don't do wrap around after school and have just one club each in the week. They still get an awful lot of time at home as a result so we find we have to get them out doing something physical on a weekend.

Every family is different though.

I’m confused I was answering you directly. You asked me if I understood about children needing to be bored. I replied.

Enjoy it now cause in a few years you won't get them out of their rooms.

Can you not do movie days at home or games nights, get them in the kitchen making home made pizzas and ice cream sundaes

Nintendo ring fit is good cause it will tire them out and they can play against each other, you can all join in

Find them a hobby they will love that they can do at home, something that will hold their attention

@zazazaaar all children are different though. I don’t feel I can leave my eldest to it when he starts thumping his little sister who is nearly four years younger. It would be a bit of a cop-out for me to walk off and let them sort it.

“They can’t hit a moving target” made me laugh. This is so true. The minute you sit down with a cuppa they’re all over it.

@Sometimeswinning I do plenty of enrichment with kids during the week and weekend. We read, we take them to museums and plays and concerts, I sit and do work with them, I supervise daily music practice and I talk to them about stuff. And YET I also insist they occupy themselves for several hours on a weekend. They have a house full of books and toys. They have each other. They can absolutely entertain themselves.

I am not choosing housework or my work over them. I am often lying on a sofa reading. But it is not my job to fill every moment of their life. They are welcome to join me on the sofa, play a board game, go into the garden, lie on the bed and stare at the ceiling. I also need downtime as someone who works FT. They also need downtime. They also need to understand that parents have their needs.

My 6 year old loves staying at home! She is so laid back, loves a lie in and can play independently for at least part of the day. She’s never said “I’m bored” luckily.

We do have other kids next door so she usually plays with them for a few hours at weekends which helps, and I usually do an activity or two eg Swimming, Library, Park but we are usually only out for part of the day.

We do have a lot of toys and crafts and she’ll happily find her own things to do. She’s also a big reader so will happily work through The Beano and do all the activities or read books.

I think it is partly personality @LMcmahon but also expectations. I don’t get up early and I don’t fill her day. She’s at school for long days Mon-Fri so I think she’s happy to do less at weekends.

That’s fine. I never said parents don’t need their own time, I just dont understand why people are so overwhelmed that the children they have don’t automatically fit into their lifestyle and the answer is “they need to be bored” It’s too basic an answer and from my very first post I explained why I take issue with it.

But it’s probably nicer for everyone on here if all posters repeat the same thing.

It’s so reassuring when I read this and realise I’m not doing anything wrong!

Yes only one child here so he can’t wind anyone else up.

He knows he has the choice of entertaining himself with toys, tv etc, or can join me sweeping leaves, cleaning onsite b and b, etc… he knows moaning just means it takes me longer and therefore longer until I’m free to do fun things with him ie bike ride.

I didn’t find DS easy as a toddler but he’s not really been any trouble since he was three and a half or so. Just the same, I wouldn’t just ignore him in the way some of these posts encourage.

Im with stuffy here. Children need to learn to be self starters. It’s a skill.

Shes not saying she ignores the kids, she’s saying she encourages independence.

It’s not a huge leap to see why so many young adults fail to launch. Kids don’t need mollycoddling- they have huge imaginations that need exercising, not to be told what to do by an adult whose imagination is half the size.

I fully agree that parents are not entertainers. I never have a problem with any of mine whining they are bored. My only slight issue (but worth it) is usually when they are entertaining themselves there’s often a den or glitter etc to tidy up.

You sound unhappy and tense, I wouldn't want to be a mother like that.