Toilet training - not wanting to go for a number 2 on the potty

[Lollie2903]

Hi all, Think my title says it all really haha

My little girl is 3 in November and we have been really relaxed with our approach to potty training. Wees came so easy and we done it for ages at home with nothing on with hardly any accidents! I didn't want to fully commit to training as such until she done a #2. Long story short she did and hated it and then wouldn't go on the potty at all for a while so we left it.

We have now committed and she asks for a nappy if she wants a #2 or waits until she has one on for sleep. Tough love isn't going to work, I tried and she kept saying please mummy, I could see she was so uncomfortable so I put one on her, she let it out straight away sighed with relief and said thank you mummy.
I felt so so awful.

She is amazing when were out, always tells us when she needs the potty in time and when were at home takes herself.

I guess I just need reassurance that this will come with time. Not sure what I can do to help? Nursery has said it is normal but I'm still worried as I've never heard of this.

Thanks in advance!

We had this with DS1. I'm not going to claim it's the best parenting out there, but in desperation DH told him he'd get one of the silver coins from daddy's pocket if he did a poo in the potty.

Within 24 hours he was doing 3 or 4 a day!

Poo goes to pooland is what we used for my two year old. There is a video on YouTube and I have heard there is an app but I never used that.

With DD we resorted to bribery and using a toilet not potty.
It took a few weeks but no problems now

My DD was potty trained a few months ago and she gets a piece of chocolate every time she does a poo in the toilet.

Not sure exactly when we will stop but she hasn't had any accidents for a while now.

We have tried to bribe but she wont even sit. I don't want to push too much and spoil the progress she has already made. i am going to get the steps for the toilet and see if that will encourage her too.
And without going into too much detail we have an open door policy so she knows mummy and daddy go #2 as well and she claps and tell us she's proud of us haha!!

DS never did anything on the potty, he wouldn't even have it in the same room as him, straight to a seat on the toilet and a step

It was a hard task to get her to even sit. We started with just going into the bathroom, then sitting on the toilet then eventually she went....after sitting there for a long while. Once she did one or two, crudely she wanted to make a bigger plop each time. It became a game for a while but at least she went.

My two were exactly the same. I didn't use a potty at all.

Have you tried your DD on the toilet?

thats amazing. My DD is just so stubborn, will sit no problem for a wee though so its not so much a fear of the potty, more the feeling of going for a #2 without a nappy on. Like she wont even go on the floor. She has gone in her knickers a couple of times though

No ordering steps now! and will see how that goes! Nice to hear it does seem to be a thing. Only person I have spoke to in real life her DD still needs to go in a nappy now and shes 5 so really trying to prevent.

We had this with DS - dry during the day for months but refused to even try to poo on the potty. I actually asked for advice on here & a number of people recommended bribery so we went to Smyths together & chose a special toy (actually a set of about 5 vehicles) & I explained he would get one of the vehicles each day he pooed on the potty.

It took about a fortnight of looking at the box & talking about it before he finally asked to poo on the potty. He's been really reliable since - 1 or 2 accidents where he was engrossed in playing & didn't make it in time, but that's not bad in 6 months.

We had to buy my son goldfish as a reward.

yes, poo goes to Pooland….

Hope the step helps @Lollie2903. It's such a milestone that seems all-consuming at the time and then, like everything else, fades away!

I do remember also buying some "fun soap" for the kids to use after going to the toilet - there's always an "incentive" involved when training a new skill!

Good luck!

I think we will let her pick something this weekend and try! thank you :)

Oh yes kids wont do anything for nothing LOL

As she's asking for a nappy why don't you put one in the potty for her to poo on? We did that with one of ours and soon they were happily using the potty for everything without the nappy. When we transitioned to the toilet they didn't like the splash so we suspended a nappy into the bowl for a while then one day they just did a poo no problem! Good luck...

Had this with both mine. Only just finished training my 3 year old ds. He refused to poo anywhere but a nappy and would get really distressed if we tried to suggest the toilet or potty. We tried bribes and putting a nappy on the potty but none of that worked. Didn't want him to become constipated so we just let him have a nappy for his poos when he asked and didn't put any pressure at all. This lasted 3 months and then one day (couple of weeks after he turned 3) he just decided to go for a poo on the toilet and it was fine. Since then he has been completely out of nappies. Hope this helps. Good luck!

We've had a lot of "knicker poos" - at least yours is asking for a nappy!

It's been a number of months, but lots of encouragement and stickers later, she does now try to tell us that she needs a poo and we've had some in the toilet and potty...

Would it help if she could go directly on the loo?

I used a potty seat and step for toilet training it was much easier (aged 2).

Even as a child I thought potty’s were a bit grim!

I agree about bribery OP. My toddlers were all about the chocolate! You only need to get them to do it a couple of times in my experience, then they lose the fear. So yeah, whatever works!

Take her to the toilet, put the nappy on, put the poo in the toilet, and take the pressure off.