DSD starting new school in yr9 and struggling to settlr

[Username19273]

**Typo in header should say settle.
Just wanted some help and advice

DSD started a new secondary school this September after moving in with us to live. DSD had friendship issues at last school so we’re hoping for a fresh start.

First week went up and down as expected but she seemed to have made friends with a group by the end of the week so was in good spirits.

Monday evening got upset saying she doesn’t want to go to school, the girls didn’t speak to her other than saying hi. Then had a meltdown this morning refusing to get dressed, refusing to go to school. DP managed to get her into school and asked if a wellbeing teacher could greet her so she had support today.

Called the school and they said so far so good, that she’s found a group of friends and just needs to build her confidence up as she said she doesn’t know anything in class. however DSD has messaged today to say she’s had a bad day, everyone ignored her at lunch and she has no friends.

Has anyone got any advice or have children who have been through the same thing?
Both myself and my partner had pretty positive experiences from school so are struggling with how to navigate this in the best way.

Sorry your DSD is experiencing this. I would encourage her to speak to girls in other years groups. She could join some extra curriculum activities after school that will enable her to socialise and meet other girls other than those in her year group. She needs to show those other girls that she can happily move on, and speak to other girls, because their behaviour towards her is clearly intentional and will only worsen should she attempt to communicate with or engage further with them. Perhaps she can also join a club that occurs at lunchtime so in that way, she could sit with those girls for lunch before heading to their club, it all depends what’s available I guess.