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freind at wits end. can you help?

4 replies

eleanorsmum · 04/06/2008 08:17

My friends dd is 3.6yrs and has toilet trained her from 2.4 yrs but she is still having accidents! she goes to pre-school every afternoon (with my dd!) and sometimes comes home with wet knickers. mum has tried ignoring, praise for dry days, removal of favourite toys, reward charts etc but she can be dry for two weeks and then go in one day and come home wet. she knows how to ask (very good language skills) and how to go by herself. she seems to get engrossed in what she is doing and doesn't wnat to miss out so just wets herself. the annoying thing is she can do it and is dry for a few weeeks at a time then one day she wet again. the teachers at pre-school have done the whole constant reminder thing and will change her if wet but she soemtimes doesn't tell anyone. Mum is getting embaressed and angry as she can do it.

what other tips can you come up with? i wondered if she was overtired and missed the key sensation trigger but she sleeps well. she still wears nappy at nigth which is very wet byt he morning. (she has even soiled in her sleep and mum can change her without her waking up!) Mum has spoken to docs who won't do anything until she is 5, so as you can guess mum is at wits end right now! any advice?

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
eleanorsmum · 04/06/2008 11:30

bump

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seeker · 04/06/2008 11:36

How often does this happen? I thought it was quite normal to have the occasional accident - I know both of mine had one or two even once they started school.

5 think it's just a matter of ignoring it wand waiting for her to get there. My dd was only just out of nappies at 3.6, so compared to her your friend's dd's doing brilliantly.

Too late now, but perhaps she started a bit too young.

eleanorsmum · 04/06/2008 12:57

agree accidents happen but its more deliberate as to not mis out than a genuine accident. She can be dry for weeks and then does one on purpose so she doesn't have to miss out on story time or soemthing she really enjoys.

have to say don't agree with too early, each child is ready when they are and she can quite clearly do the potty thing. but thanks.

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sazzlesb · 26/06/2008 19:00

Whilst each child is indeed ready at their own pace, I have seen friends who tried to train their children when they clearly weren't ready and literally months later, they have accidents all the time and have totally regressed. Don't know why this seems to happen but could be a reason for these accidents. I know how frustrating it is, but suggest your friend tries not to get angry - it only draws attention to the behaviour (easier said than done I know). Maybe she should get her daughter to help clean herself up?

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