Questions about letting my daughter get her ears pierced

[usernameOct2025]

I was never allowed to get my ears pierced because my big sister had an earring riped out of her ear. My daughter is 10 and she wants to get her ears pierced. I told her yes.

I wouldn't want to past down my fear of earrings to my daughter. But because I have been scared of the idea of wearing earrings, I don't much about them. Does the procedure to get them pierced hurt ? Does she wear earrings after the procedure ? How to prevent them from getting infected ? Long after the procedure, are earrings safe to sleep in. Are they safe to shower with ?

If you're reading this post, you can stop here and still be able to give good answers. I'm also wondering about getting my own ears pierced. If I did, I would have very similar questions. I don't want the fear brought up by what happened to my sister to stop me. A question about earrings that is only relevant for adults is are they safe to wear while having sex ? I'm sorry if I seem incredibly naive. I know the phobia sounds silly. Any advice will be appreciated.

Go to a proper piercer. Like the sort that does noses and belly buttons with a proper piercing needle. Not like Claire’s. They will be more expensive, but it will be done correctly, not by an 18 year old with an hour of training.

They will be able to provide you with good quality earrings that won’t cause a reaction and give you all the aftercare advice.

Yes, it hurts. But it’s not terrible. Dd cried in between but was happy to proceed and have the 2nd one done. Yes, you keep them in all the time after, including for sleeping and showering. But I think won’t be able to do things like swimming for a few weeks. She also won’t be able to remove them for a period of time (4-6 weeks?), so needs to have nothing planned where they have to come out. If done properly, they should give you saline solution for cleaning after and show you how to do it.

And yes, you can wear them for any adult activity, though I think most adults (and children, beyond those initial weeks when you can’t remove them), take them out at night. This may depend on if you wear small studs or big hippie dangly ones. I wear big dangly ones, so take them out before showering or going to bed or swimming/running/biking/whatever.

Thank you for answering. It's embarrassing to ask people IRL since I have an irrational fear.

My 2 dd's were 4 and 5..the older one cried, the other one laughed!! Both used surgical spirit and cotton bud under supervision every day. Never had any issues. Both adults now.

My daughter plays soccer. Is it rational to worry ?

Yes, it’s painful but it’s not a crying out or being upset level of pain. Afterwards the pain quickly subsides unless you the earrings caught in hair or clothes etc. It can be a bit sore for a few days to sleep on them but they heal very quickly.

The piercer will give you full aftercare advice including how to clean them and how often. They usually have to stay in for at least six weeks and sleeping or showering with them is fine.

Children usually get asked to remove or tape over them for sports.

Go to a piercing place that uses needles. When I got my 2nd and 3rd lobes done they advised to use a saline spray a couple of times a day. Mine were pierced with flat backed earrings so you can leave them in all the time. I dont really take mine out at all. I bought other flatbacked earrings to replace them (labrets)

Go somewhere that uses good quality simple gold studs. They will advise you on all aftercare, usually weeks of keeping them in, disinfecting and turning them.

Completely safe to wear studs for almost anything, maybe not for extreme sports but even in football and karate, I don't recall any earring related injuries (studs) over the years.

Personally I sleep with earrings too. Sleeper hoops normally but I have indeed fallen asleep with dressy and novelty Christmas earrings in with no ill effects.

No, dont turn new piercings. It opens the wound again and prolongs the healing time

Titanium is supposed to be a good non allergenic metal to use

It's safe to wear earrings doing anything pretty much except maybe contact sports and going through an MRI scanner.

Sex is just physical activity with another person. I mean I wouldn't wear enormous hoops in bed as they might get in the way.

But small earrings sure. If in doubt for any reason or during any activity just take them off!!

Go to a reputable shop where they use a needle and follow aftercare instructions. You and daughter will both be fine! Use titanium or gold as they are less likely to cause allergy.

You'll have fun choosing earrings together and trying different looks.

Think of how many people all around the world have lots of ear piercings. It's very low risk.

Dd had hers done in the summer holidays, she was 9 (10 now). We went to a proper piercing studio and the guy used a needle. It was over and done with in 5 minutes. He didn’t even tell dd he was going to do it. He was just chatting and then did it. She didn’t cry at all and said it stung a bit but was ok. No numbing gel or anything. He used titanium earrings with a screw on flat back so dd has been fine sleeping in them. He advised cleaning with salt water and a cotton bud which we did (other don’t advise this) and to leave them alone, no turning etc. it’s been 7 weeks now and I haven’t changed them yet. Going to leave it until half-term when it will be 10 weeks. She’s just put tape over them for PE and dance.

I absolutely agree with going to a proper piercer. I too had / have a fear of earrings - I had to make sure that my DD felt responsible enough for the daily cleaning herself before she had them pierced. We went to a local tattoo shop - scrupulously clean and gentler than using a gun. It was very much a softer approach than high street stores and they talked to my DD properly about the importance of aftercare. And, whilst we did not need to, I felt we could go back to them should we need to. PP has given you good advice re timing etc.

Having said all of that, your DD is still only 10 - and if you feel you need to hold off a few years, she will be ok: it can be all too easy to have things RIGHT NOW. Delayed gratification can be very rewarding 😊

I disagree on proper piercer. I did that with my 2 eldest at the same time, their ears closed up the first time they removed the earrings, long after the 6 week period, I think it was close to 15 weeks. Because of the earrings the piercer used it was hard to put the earrings back in. They used screw earrings where the earring goes from back to front rather than traditional earrings.

When I went back with my 2 oldest we went to Superdrug and their ears have been absolutely fine since then. I took my 8yo for her birthday, took her to the same Superdrug. Superdrug was recommended by another mum who had the same trouble after visiting a proper piercing shop.

Yes it hurts, how much depends on the child, so dose how long. It usually passes quickly but will be sensitive for a while. I keep a bottle of andesol in our first aid kit so a little dab of that seemed to make them happy when they complained.
Cleaning is easy, they will sell you cleaning stuff but all you need is sterile water, I add a bit of salt. Clean front and back each day for 4-6 weeks. Make sure you have regular clean pillowcases too.
tie hair back as much as possible to stop getting it caught.
careful with some clothes that they don’t catch.

I always said no until high school but gave in when oldest were turning 9 & 11. I made them understand it hurts and they can back out any time. Same with my 8yo, she cried after the first earring but wanted to follow through, oldest only flinched. Youngest said she knew it would hurt but hadn’t fully understood how much. We are almost 3 months in and is excited about wearing new earrings at Christmas, she wants to keep her original ones in till then.

The only thing I would add in addition to the all the good advice above is that if you do decide to go ahead but then at the last second want to change your mind then that is ok too. I'm scarred after seeing a young girl change her mind in Claire's and her mum forced her to still get her ears pierced. It was so upsetting hearing her scream the place down. I complained immediately to the manager and tried to intervene and reported it afterwards.

Check school policy re earrings- many primary schools don't allow taping so for 6 weeks after having them done she won't be able to do PE. That's why people often get them done at the start of the summer holidays.

Mn will tell you needles only. I did this with dd 1 and it took a long time to heal. When I had my second stud done age 40 I went to a salon that was recommended and they used a hand pressure device that they put a canister in that was single use. It was painless and healed well so when dtds had their ears pierced age 10 I took them there and they were fab, healed really well. Old style guns are best avoided but the newer version are great.

we removed them for most sport (I wear mine for running and rarely take them out - second piercing is a tiny diamond stud but first is a small hoop). I sleep and bathe in them.

It can hurt one of my DD's friends had one done and refused the other one, screaming! She did get them redone afterwards, my DD was stoic. Yes you get rings in straightaway rotate them regularly so they don't stick, use a bit of antiseptic cream or salt wash if they start to look or feel infected and/or go back to whoever did them. Go somewhere reputable.

The school allows it. Her friends wear earrings to school.

I'm not saying earrings aren't allowed- only that they have to be removed for PE and if they've just been pierced she won't be able to do that

It's allowed for gym class, and even soccer practice.

Very poor school PE policy then!

Can you tell me why ?

You can't overshare. I want hear as much context as possible.

They just ask for them to be taped in my children’s school although it’s not actually enforced.

Get it done with a needle by a proper piercer, not a gun, even the newer ones. Implant grade titanium for at least 8 weeks before
you change them.

Important to get gold/ real siver or titanium. No other dud metals.
Sleepers are better than studs IMHO.

My DD had hers done a few months ago, by a proper piercer based in a tattoo studio. She barely flinched. She still has the same earrings in. Her school is ok with them - she hasn't been asked to remove or tape them for PE or anything.

She's 9.