Bedtime struggles with DS

[TheMaryClaire]

Last night, my 3-year-old DS asked for ‘just one more story’… five times. By the time he finally fell asleep, I was the one snoring next to his bed! I know bedtime routines are supposed to help, but ours feels like a full production every night. Does anyone else’s bedtime drag on forever? How do you actually get kids to settle quickly?

Strict boundaries- at bedtime it’s 1 story or 1 chapter only in our house! Happy to read as much as they like at any other time but if I didn’t set a limit they’d definitely keep pushing for ‘one more’ and get upset if I said no and an efficient bedtime is for everyone’s benefit, especially theirs because they need their sleep!

Same as Bit strict boundaries, they have to know when the bed time routine is coming to an end. Otherwise you could be going on for 8 or 10 stories. You cannot parent out of fear of upsetting them. They are always going to get upset about something not going the way they want. Sleep is essential which is why a good bedtime routine helps them know what comes next.

I would also not ever stay with them whilst they fell asleep. You have a relationship to maintain, time for you and your partner to be together. Or at least time for yourself. That is equally as important. I would say to my children that I have things to do which I did, then same goodnight, see you in the morning stuff and out the door.

As pps have said, it’s one story then bed in our house, otherwise story time would go on forever! DC1 will tell us every night they’re not tired, but still they get into bed after story time and will lie there quietly (usually) until they fall asleep.

I follow the same approach as pp: we have strict rules around books.

I’ve also found that bringing my child upstairs to their room a little earlier and allowing some play or relaxation time beforehand makes a big difference. I take my 3 and half year old upstairs at 6:30 pm. She can play until 7:00 pm, at which point she needs to get into bed. After that, we read two books and have a little chat until 7:30 pm. From then on, there’s no talking — just lying quietly in bed.

My 4 year old isn’t allowed “one more”. He gets to choose a number of books (between one and three) depending on how quickly he got himself ready for bed and therefore how much time is available. He picks them out and knows that once they’ve been read, we’re done. He does choose a Yoto card to listen to while he falls asleep after that though.

Put on soft and tender music next to him. Soft music can put anyone to sleep. Or perhaps you could record yourself singing and make sure its good quality then play it at your sons bedtime.