Apologies, long post! But wanted to give as much detail as possible!
DS has just started reception and to start with he was absolutely fine, happy going in, talked really positively about his days and everything was going great!
Until last Wednesday, which was week 3, his first week of doing full days. I got a call to say he’d been very upset all morning, and had a temperature so could I pick him up. He was fine once I got him home, temperature had gone down. He’d had his flu vaccination the day before so I put it down to that.
Next day he was fine going in as usual but said he’d cried in the morning as he was missing me. Then Friday he was fine going in again but cried when it was time to say goodbye to me. We’re allowed to go in the classroom with them at the moment and help them settle. This was the first time he’d cried at drop off and took me by surprise. But he was happy at pick up so I didn’t think much of it.
Then Sunday night at bedtime he was inconsolable, crying that he didn’t want to go to school. He hadn’t mentioned anything all weekend and when we had talked about school there was no indication he was feeling this way, everything had been very positive again. He was even showing off his phonics to his grandparents! So again, this anxiety about school was a bit of a surprise. Me and Dh tried to reassure him at the same time as acknowledging his worries. He said he was only upset about not being with me while at school, not for any other reason. Monday morning was more of the same, lots of tears, saying he didn’t want to go repeatedly. I managed to get him there without much of a fight he was just very upset and in floods of tears sat on the carpet when I left.
I was a worried mess the whole day but he came out with a big smile on his face! We even went to the playground after school and he was playing with some of the boys in his class very happily!
Last night and this morning were much of the same. Still very upset, saying he misses me while at school. I spoke to his teacher this morning and she said he’s struggling to regulate himself in the mornings but is fine after lunch. I think she thought this would reassure me but it’s had the opposite effect! I’m now worrying he’s upset all morning until lunchtime which feels like a long time! I was hoping he was just upset when I left and fine not long afterwards 😭
Anyway, I guess I’m just after some advice or helpful success stories if you’ve gone through something similar and come out the other side! He was similar at the start of nursery last year, but mostly got over it in about a week or 2. We’ve been trying different ways to help him, like drawing a heart on his hand for him to press when missing me. I’ve made him a reward chart today so he’s put stickers for every day he goes to school and can choose a toy when he reaches half term. (Not sure if this goal is too far away, maybe I should do a small reward for completing a week?) I’ve also tried asking him to draw me a picture while at school and different tasks to focus on/distract him. But any other ideas I’d greatly appreciate!
It’s so heartbreaking and causing me to feel very worried about him all day, I’m also struggling to concentrate on anything! He’s very bright and sociable and loves learning. He was so excited about school and I feel so sad for him that he’s struggling so much!