Hello 👋 there. I’ve not really done anything like this before and not sure if I am doing this right. I started this before couple months ago but chixkened out but I’m just looking for some help please 🙏 if anyone can give me any ? Maybe some advice and to hear other people’s stories ? And just for someone to hear me and listen to me and for me to talk to someone anyone about it and for somebody to talk back to me. Even now I’m debating weather or not to send this but sometimes I just feel like I’m at breaking point and am crying so much because it hurts. So me and my fiancée have a just turned 3 year old beautiful little girl. She is non verbal and only says the odd word and we are in the process of speaking with different professionals as she has Autism but the reason I’m on here is because even though I read it on google and except what’s being said it still hurts and I am just really really struggling with it his right now. For quite a few months now my daughter has only really wanted her daddy and the love she shows him is just beautiful it really is and although I am truly happy for them both and it’s lovely to see I’m not gunna lie it is like crushing which is why I always say I’m not jealous which I’m not and I wouldn’t have it any other way but I’m just envious. I just love my daughter so so much and I know that she loves me bless her and I know that she’s only 3 she’s not doing anything wrong or anything and I know this is on me and about me but I just feel like I really really do need that sometimes a cuddle or just anything and when she hurts herself she will only go to him and it’s killing me inside as it hurts so so badly am I being selfish?? I don’t think I am maybe I am but I just want what he’s got and not to compare but I want her to know that she’s can come to me when hurt anything and how much I love her which again I know she knows that I love her and then I feel like I am being selfish as every now and then say like I put the tablet on she will sit next to me but I don’t I just go to bed at night feeling like I’m missing out and I know that I’m not going to get that time back but at the same time I don’t want to and would never force her to you know do something she doesn’t want to do like go up and pick her up I usually wait and ask her if Mummy can have a cuddle please and put my arms out and if she walks towards me then I will put my arms around her but she never stays there for to lon. I’m really really sorry for the long long post but I just need to talk about it to someone as my partner doesn’t really understand and if anyone has advice ora story of there own as I know that I’m not the only one feeling this way but I just take my self off to the bathroom and cry and cry as it just hurts so much and I sometimes feel like I’m a bad Mum and thinking what if anything I could have maybe possibly done to have a stronger bond I dunno am I being selfish ?? And is this all my fault ?? Sorry guys to hear back from anyone would be really really great and helpful thank you as I just feel like I’m kinda drowning and it’s just nice to know that I’m being heard and listened to anything will be much appreciated thank you all 🩷💙☺️ Dawn X