How to stop DDs from waking each other up?

[Btowngirl]

We have an almost 4 and almost 1 year old. The last 2 weeks have gotten so bad with sleep.

The baby wakes for a couple of feeds at least (after months of once per night) and if it’s anywhere near 4am or later then our 4 year old cries out approx 5 mins after I’ve settled the baby. Her cry completely unsettles the baby and so we start the merry dance of settling one, then the other waking. We have been going between them since 0330 today.

We have white noise in each room by the door. They’re opposite eachother so don’t even share a wall. It’s not such a problem for baby as she obviously naps, but DD1 is constantly exhausted & whiney which is rubbish for her as well as breaking me. I’m back in work after MAT in less than 2 weeks and feel like I will have a breakdown if it’s like this.

I would take the baby back into your room until there is reliable sleep during the night, Mine shared as young children and Dd2 was with us until she was 14ish months. DD1 was at school and it wasn't fair her getting a broken sleep.

Sorry I read it as they shared i would still take. The baby back with you so there is as little disruption as possible.

When DD2 is going through a phase of not sleeping I have her in our room with us so I can get to her ASAP and this has stopped her waking up DD1

Thanks for your advice. Sadly having DD2 in with us on holiday in July caused quite a lot of sleep issues, for her as well as us. She’s been in her own room since 7m so finds it a complete novelty coming in with us and gets really lively/doesn't sleep. I might try putting her down in her room then bring her in at first wake again, it feels almost like a backward step though. We got more sleep in the newborn days.

I am BF currently, considering switching to formula to try & get a bigger feed into her. Only issue is she is quite slight and eats like a sparrow. She can go down from 2oz of expressed and then be ready for another 2oz at next feed etc. DD1 has always slept through anything prior to this, so typical in time for going back to work!

She can have cows milk now can't she ? or maybe some toddler formula if you are considering stopping breastfeeding a drink might fill her up more but then she might be.BF for comfort so you might need to replace it for a sippy cup during the night,

I get what you are saying about her carrying on in your bed. You are damned if you do damned if you don't.

You’ve nailed how I feel 🥲

She can have alternative milk from 12m so would probably go for formula until then. She’s a really good eater but like I say, quite a sparrow so any extra nutrients I can give her I will! I wasn’t really planning on stopping bf tbh but will trial anything for everyone to get better sleep.

You might not have to stop just supplement with a bit of formula, .you must be knackered if you do decide to not bf during the night dad can get up with her.