Attachment in babies

[OneLilac]

My 9 month old is really attached to me, I can’t walk away from him or leave the room without him crying for me. I don’t know if it’s because he’s BF so he goes everywhere with me. Even if he’s with his father he’s winging because I’m not in the room

That’s normal, he’s at the age where they realise you two are separate people and he just wants to be with you because it means he’s safe. He will get used to being with his dad, and you know he’s safe then so while it can be tough it’s fine to leave him if you need/want to do something or go somewhere.

I found for mine that separation anxiety suddenly ramped up once they could crawl - I don't know if it was age alone, or if it was the fact that because they realised they could leave me, I could also leave THEM.

I think you could practice leaving your DC for gradually longer periods with their dad & that will help because baby will realise you always come back!

Both of mine were like this, but I can't comment on the BF thing, as I BF them both.
I've gotta be honest, DS is 5 and can still be a bit clingy and whingey with me!
It's all a phase though, and it does get much better fairly quickly.

This is normal at this age.

Lots of micro separations helps - I didn’t take mine to the toilet with me as we had a playpen, so she was used to me disappearing for a minute or two then coming back. And we alternated who did bedtime so she was fine if with DH rather than me.

Thank you guys, he is crawling and as soon as he sees me walk away he instantly follows me wherever. I don’t have a play pen to leave him in.

Perfectly normal and healthy. It’s separation anxiety, happens between about 7-12 months. It means you have a healthy baby who is developing properly. Take him with you or just reassure him when you return. It literally stopped overnight at 12 months and it was like I had a totally new baby, happy, confident, independent, happy to be left to explore. It won’t be forever.

I agree that it’s perfectly normal and age appropriate.

Does his DF take him out on his own at all or do you leave them to it for an hour whilst you go for a run or a walk or meet a friend?

Yes his dad takes him sometimes even if it’s just to the shop down the road. The most I’ve left him is an hour.

I think it might be time to up the amount of time you leave him. Now he’s probably on 3 meals a day you can leave him for longer

I have a funeral next week and I’m leaving him with my mum for 2 hours I’m really nervous I just don’t want him to cry constantly

Im sorry for your loss @OneLilac

Can you see your DM a bit before you go so that hes more used to being with her?

Games like Peek-a-Boo are goid for separation anxiety too.

And I always said to mine at this age, even if I’d walked out of the room and back, Mummy goes but Mummy comes back. Mummy always comes back.

And yes he might whinge when you’re not there but even if he does cry, it’s not the end of the world. Lots of babies will be in full time childcare at this age. It’s just 2 hours and it’s a one off

Thank you ❤️ I’ll be with him until around 10 am and then back at about 1. I know he’ll be fussy but it happens and he loves my mum which helps. Whenever I go toilet or leave him quickly and come back I pick him up to calm him and I always say mummy’s still here