Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

11 month old development

31 replies

Hydrangea60 · 13/09/2025 17:40

My son is 11.15 months old and I have concerns about his development. There is a history of autism in my family, the extent of which I wasn't fully aware before I got pregnant.

He failed the ASQ a couple of weeks ago on pretty much everything except problem solving. His communication is particularly poor (he scored in the black area for this). This is because he can't follow instructions, say any words, point or play a nursery game when you ask him to.

He can clap and wave but does this when he wants to rather than when you ask him to (although he does sometimes copy). I don't know whether he just doesn't understand, or if he understands but won't listen. Both are obviously a concern. He babbles a lot but nothing that could be interpreted as a word. I've been signing to him for months but he has no interest in it so I've almost given up with it now.

I'm finding it hard to teach him words because all he wants to do is crawl around and cruise. He won't sit still and has no attention span whatsoever. He'll play with a toy for about 10 seconds before getting bored. His night sleep is generally good (he does about 7.30 to 6.30 with no wake ups most nights, apart from when he's ill or teething) but his daytime naps are terrible and always have been. Even as a newborn he slept fairly well at night but awfully during the day.

He's generally a very happy, smiley and sociable baby. He started nursery recently and seems to enjoy it, the staff have remarked on how well he's settled. He's very curious and affectionate and I did think all was OK, but the ASQ failure has been absolutely devastating. No one else I know has had to have a follow up review so I feel so alone.

I'm seeing the perinatal mental health team but am being discharged soon. They think I'm overreacting and that this is normal baby/toddler behaviour but apparently neither me nor my husband was like this, and the lack of communication is so worrying.

Has anyone else been in the same situation, and how did things turn out?

OP posts:
FanofLeaves · 13/09/2025 21:53

Bloody hell- he’s 11 months old! Aren’t you expecting a bit much?! He’s not even one for goodness sake. Problem solving?!ack of communication?! I’ll say it again.
He’s
Not
Even
One

Try and enjoy him!

Haveiwon · 13/09/2025 22:06

At this age the most important thing is his understanding. Does he understand what you say? Everyday activities like “Lets go to the park!”- would he look excited and go to the door? “Bath time now” - would he move towards the bathroom?

If he can understand you, everything else is very very likely to come over the next year/ 2 years. If he can’t, maybe see about booking a hearing test.

Also, remember that if he does have autism, there is nothing anyone can do at this age really (and the NHS doesn’t really like to do anything before 3 and even then it’s all teaching parents strategies, most of which you can find on the interest yourself) and he is still the same baby he was yesterday/ a month ago/ when he was born.

Also, my children didn’t really start signing until 14 months so he maybe just be a little young for that.

OtterMummy2024 · 14/09/2025 07:29

I delayed doing that ASQ until the latest possible date. Four extra weeks (compared to the first possible date) made a huge difference to how many things DC "passed". And it's very normal for babies who are learning to cruise/ walk to ONLY want to do that and concentrate on nothing else.

Did the HV suggest revisiting things in a month or two?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

BunnyRuddington · 14/09/2025 07:54

If it was the 12 month Ages & Stages, he was at the very beginning of the age range for that assessment. It goes from 12 months to 12 months and 30 days.

I would do the assessment again a couple, in the week before he turns 13 months and see how he scores then.

If he still scored in the black for communication I would suggest you ask your HV for a hearing test for him and a referral to Portage.

Has the HV booked a further appointment with you?

Avie29 · 14/09/2025 08:29

Hold on… my daughter is 21months and doesn’t really say any words, she says kitty and bye and thats about it, i think expecting words from an 11 month old is a bit much.
i have 2 diagnosed autistic children, my son in particular 10yo is non verbal, cognitive delay, still having toileting accidents, and sensory processing disorder and at 11 months seemed like any other 11 month old (hes a twin so literally had another 11month old right beside him) except he wasn’t crawling, he was diagnosed at 3.5, 11 months is way to early to be looking for signs of autism, give him another year and if still not communicating etc then look into it a bit further although my eldest son 13 didn’t talk or walk till he was nearly 2 due to glue ear, once that was sorted he was fine.
my daughter who is also autistic hit every milestone, passed all the development checks and it wasn’t untill she was 4/5 until i started to worry there was something not quite right about her thought process/ social skills and sensory problems.
my advice would be have his hearing checked, and give him time, stop reading about autism because honestly everyone has some sort of autistic trait and you will see it everywhere, get some cause and effect toys- it helps with anticipation, speech (ready set go!) eye contact and will help with clapping, pointing etc xx

Cinai · 14/09/2025 08:34

Mine sounds exactly like yours, he’s 12 months old, very sociable and doesn’t do any of the things you mentioned. He only just now starts to copy me clapping etc sometimes, not always.

Nosleepforthismum · 14/09/2025 08:41

He’s probably fine. Mine was only just crawling by 11 months, ate sand, didn’t point or respond to his name and definitely didn’t follow instructions. I worried about autism for ages but he’s 4 now with only a very mild speech delay and all professionals we’ve spoken to aren’t concerned.

Mine failed every ASQ we were given but he got there in his own time. They are anxiety provoking for parents with very normal kids and I have lots of friends (with boys) that failed the 12 month ASQ so please don’t worry at all about this. He’s still a baby really.

BunnyRuddington · 14/09/2025 08:43

BunnyRuddington · 14/09/2025 07:54

If it was the 12 month Ages & Stages, he was at the very beginning of the age range for that assessment. It goes from 12 months to 12 months and 30 days.

I would do the assessment again a couple, in the week before he turns 13 months and see how he scores then.

If he still scored in the black for communication I would suggest you ask your HV for a hearing test for him and a referral to Portage.

Has the HV booked a further appointment with you?

11 months to 12 months and 30 days.

BunnyRuddington · 14/09/2025 08:45

Avie29 · 14/09/2025 08:29

Hold on… my daughter is 21months and doesn’t really say any words, she says kitty and bye and thats about it, i think expecting words from an 11 month old is a bit much.
i have 2 diagnosed autistic children, my son in particular 10yo is non verbal, cognitive delay, still having toileting accidents, and sensory processing disorder and at 11 months seemed like any other 11 month old (hes a twin so literally had another 11month old right beside him) except he wasn’t crawling, he was diagnosed at 3.5, 11 months is way to early to be looking for signs of autism, give him another year and if still not communicating etc then look into it a bit further although my eldest son 13 didn’t talk or walk till he was nearly 2 due to glue ear, once that was sorted he was fine.
my daughter who is also autistic hit every milestone, passed all the development checks and it wasn’t untill she was 4/5 until i started to worry there was something not quite right about her thought process/ social skills and sensory problems.
my advice would be have his hearing checked, and give him time, stop reading about autism because honestly everyone has some sort of autistic trait and you will see it everywhere, get some cause and effect toys- it helps with anticipation, speech (ready set go!) eye contact and will help with clapping, pointing etc xx

Your DD only saying Kitty and Bye-bye st 21 months does sound a bit behind @Avie29. How does she do on this simple progress checker ?

Btowngirl · 14/09/2025 08:48

OP, politely forget the milestones. Babies do things in their own time and the less pressure we put on them, the better. It will be protocol to follow him up, which is the right thing to do just in case. But just keep doing what you’re doing, play games with him and sing to him as normal.

If it offers any reassurance, our DD1 was basically able to sit at that age if we sat her up ourselves. She didn’t walk or talk until really late but was also really content and sociable. She’s 3 now and so chatty and kind and lovely and caring. She learnt to run recently which feels like a huge milestone for us, despite all our friends children running when they were between 12-18m. It just doesn’t matter what other children do if it’s going to stress you out and burden the relationship and interactions you and your DS have.

Things you can do low key to help, chat with him. Reiterate significant words such as drink, food, more etc. Learn some makaton and do these signs alongside the words as most children can sign before talking. Not sure how you feel about screen time but some programmes really helped progress our DD’s words like yakka Dee on bbc I player. There are those little card machines where they put cards in and it tells them the word, he sounds physically able so you could probably teach him to put them in himself.

Teachingagain · 14/09/2025 08:50

I disagree that you shouldn’t be concerned but I wouldn’t be jumping to autism. Ask the GP for a referal for a hearing test. Stastically it’s much more likely to be hearing issue than autism.

Avie29 · 14/09/2025 08:59

BunnyRuddington · 14/09/2025 08:45

Your DD only saying Kitty and Bye-bye st 21 months does sound a bit behind @Avie29. How does she do on this simple progress checker ?

Honestly im not worried, as you can see from my post ive had experience with delays, she is far more interested in other areas of her development where she is ahead, also i think some of it is down to the household being well versed in picking up non verbal ques due to my son so she hasn’t had the need to speak which is something we need to work on but im not worried yet, she is also very good at communicating her wants needs without needing to speak, so as far as communicating goes she is very good, just not the speech part yet xx

BunnyRuddington · 14/09/2025 09:06

@Avie29i think it’s worth doing the very simple progress checker that I linked to. My DC2 was very similar at tgat age and is now diagnosed as AuDHD. I’m obviously not saying that your DD is ND but with the lack of speech and other siblings having ND it’s definitely worth doing the progress checker at least Smile

LegoHouse274 · 14/09/2025 09:06

@OtterMummy2024it will almost certainly be the correct age adjusted QSQ as there is one for the age OP suggests. It's a bit of a myth that the 1yr review assesses all children from 10 months with a 12+ month ASQ, they don't, there's different ones.

OP, my baby is just turning 11 months and almost exactly as you describe having just had his review the other week. He was also in the black for communication and just into the grey for gross motor. The communication I was well aware would be the case as he literally started making some consonent noises only the week before the review. This is my third baby so the difference between them and my older two with communication is stark as they were both at the early side with all their communication milestones. DC3 only babbles a little, can't point or wave, doesn't appear to understand much of what I say, doesn't bring or show me things, doesn't follow many commands etc. All that being said he is more physically able than either of my older two children were at this age (one was just starting to bum shuffle and the other was not mobile at all except for being able to roll a little). So I'm thinking it's probably a bit of a 'swings and roundabouts' situation really, they're all different with different interests.

The 10 second attention span is normal of all babies that age btw. It doesn't get better until they're a lot older!

Anyway the outcome of my DC3's review was that there going to call me again in 2 months and do another age adjusted screening for his communication then and see if he's caught up by then. I'm not confident he will, but I also know there's absolutely nothing that could be done about it now anyway. It's not like you can do speech therapy with a baby who isn't even 1! I'm not worried really, there's no point in worrying, it doesn't serve any useful purpose.

Beautifulscribbles · 14/09/2025 09:11

Please read up on normal babies!! Your baby sounds normal! I hope you can enjoy him and release some of this pressure on him and yourself. Also book a hearing test if you're worried about communication. Temporary hearing problems like glue ear are extremely common in babies, toddlers and young children.

BunnyRuddington · 14/09/2025 09:11

LegoHouse274 · 14/09/2025 09:06

@OtterMummy2024it will almost certainly be the correct age adjusted QSQ as there is one for the age OP suggests. It's a bit of a myth that the 1yr review assesses all children from 10 months with a 12+ month ASQ, they don't, there's different ones.

OP, my baby is just turning 11 months and almost exactly as you describe having just had his review the other week. He was also in the black for communication and just into the grey for gross motor. The communication I was well aware would be the case as he literally started making some consonent noises only the week before the review. This is my third baby so the difference between them and my older two with communication is stark as they were both at the early side with all their communication milestones. DC3 only babbles a little, can't point or wave, doesn't appear to understand much of what I say, doesn't bring or show me things, doesn't follow many commands etc. All that being said he is more physically able than either of my older two children were at this age (one was just starting to bum shuffle and the other was not mobile at all except for being able to roll a little). So I'm thinking it's probably a bit of a 'swings and roundabouts' situation really, they're all different with different interests.

The 10 second attention span is normal of all babies that age btw. It doesn't get better until they're a lot older!

Anyway the outcome of my DC3's review was that there going to call me again in 2 months and do another age adjusted screening for his communication then and see if he's caught up by then. I'm not confident he will, but I also know there's absolutely nothing that could be done about it now anyway. It's not like you can do speech therapy with a baby who isn't even 1! I'm not worried really, there's no point in worrying, it doesn't serve any useful purpose.

Has the HV not offered a hearing test @LegoHouse274? If not, I’d call her tomorrow and ask for one. At least that will rule out Glue Ear being the cause Smile

BunnyRuddington · 14/09/2025 09:13

Beautifulscribbles · 14/09/2025 09:11

Please read up on normal babies!! Your baby sounds normal! I hope you can enjoy him and release some of this pressure on him and yourself. Also book a hearing test if you're worried about communication. Temporary hearing problems like glue ear are extremely common in babies, toddlers and young children.

Scoring in the black is a concern although the OP’s LO is right at the bottom of the age range so might improve a little.

Avie29 · 14/09/2025 09:21

BunnyRuddington · 14/09/2025 09:06

@Avie29i think it’s worth doing the very simple progress checker that I linked to. My DC2 was very similar at tgat age and is now diagnosed as AuDHD. I’m obviously not saying that your DD is ND but with the lack of speech and other siblings having ND it’s definitely worth doing the progress checker at least Smile

thanks for your concern @BunnyRuddington but i have 2 autistic children, and dyslexic child, my younger brother is also autistic, as is my nephew who is also ADHD, my brother inlaw is ADHD too, im well informed on ND and if i believed there was anything wrong i would certainly look into it as i obviously have for my older children, but just so you can put your mind at ease i took the test for 2year old as it was closest to her age and literally only issue was her lack of words xx

acorncrush · 14/09/2025 09:35

LegoHouse274 · 14/09/2025 09:06

@OtterMummy2024it will almost certainly be the correct age adjusted QSQ as there is one for the age OP suggests. It's a bit of a myth that the 1yr review assesses all children from 10 months with a 12+ month ASQ, they don't, there's different ones.

OP, my baby is just turning 11 months and almost exactly as you describe having just had his review the other week. He was also in the black for communication and just into the grey for gross motor. The communication I was well aware would be the case as he literally started making some consonent noises only the week before the review. This is my third baby so the difference between them and my older two with communication is stark as they were both at the early side with all their communication milestones. DC3 only babbles a little, can't point or wave, doesn't appear to understand much of what I say, doesn't bring or show me things, doesn't follow many commands etc. All that being said he is more physically able than either of my older two children were at this age (one was just starting to bum shuffle and the other was not mobile at all except for being able to roll a little). So I'm thinking it's probably a bit of a 'swings and roundabouts' situation really, they're all different with different interests.

The 10 second attention span is normal of all babies that age btw. It doesn't get better until they're a lot older!

Anyway the outcome of my DC3's review was that there going to call me again in 2 months and do another age adjusted screening for his communication then and see if he's caught up by then. I'm not confident he will, but I also know there's absolutely nothing that could be done about it now anyway. It's not like you can do speech therapy with a baby who isn't even 1! I'm not worried really, there's no point in worrying, it doesn't serve any useful purpose.

If there is a language delay then there is something you can do about it.

You can assist your baby in their language development by speaking to them as often as possible, in clear language where they can see your mouth moving to pronounce the words.

Use the same word multiple times when explaining something or talking about something, to help them with understanding the word. For example if you have a teddy you can say here is teddy, this is teddy, what is the teddy doing? The teddy is jumping, now teddy is dancing, do you want to hold teddy?

That sort of repetition, holding up the teddy each time. Do this with lots of basic things, especially things your baby will experience regularly, like having their nappy changed, changing their clothes, even with parts of their body.

It really helps the baby to hear these things often and clearly. If there will be a developmental delay then yes it won’t stop it but it will help.

If this sounds like a lot and you don’t have time then Miss Rachel has a YouTube channel where she does a lot of this, so your baby could watch some of this.

LegoHouse274 · 14/09/2025 09:40

BunnyRuddington · 14/09/2025 09:11

Has the HV not offered a hearing test @LegoHouse274? If not, I’d call her tomorrow and ask for one. At least that will rule out Glue Ear being the cause Smile

I did wonder that, no she didn't. However I really don't think the hearing is a problem tbh. They passed their newborn screening, and they visibly react to noises, even quiet ones from a distance away if they are new or something that interests them. They also do clearly understand some phrases/words e.g. turn the page / clap hands / drink / row your boat /pop / ready steady go / and recognise loads of songs and phrases from books. But I presume if still behind at 13+ months thats definitely something to look further into just to rule it out if nothing else.

LegoHouse274 · 14/09/2025 09:42

acorncrush · 14/09/2025 09:35

If there is a language delay then there is something you can do about it.

You can assist your baby in their language development by speaking to them as often as possible, in clear language where they can see your mouth moving to pronounce the words.

Use the same word multiple times when explaining something or talking about something, to help them with understanding the word. For example if you have a teddy you can say here is teddy, this is teddy, what is the teddy doing? The teddy is jumping, now teddy is dancing, do you want to hold teddy?

That sort of repetition, holding up the teddy each time. Do this with lots of basic things, especially things your baby will experience regularly, like having their nappy changed, changing their clothes, even with parts of their body.

It really helps the baby to hear these things often and clearly. If there will be a developmental delay then yes it won’t stop it but it will help.

If this sounds like a lot and you don’t have time then Miss Rachel has a YouTube channel where she does a lot of this, so your baby could watch some of this.

Edited

Oh sorry, there has been a misunderstanding. I meant nothing you can do as in no clinical interventions above and beyond what a parent would normally do.

I do all that you describe already of course. That's a normal part of parenting and what I did with all my children. The other two always met their communication milestones early or on time.

Hydrangea60 · 23/09/2025 21:33

Haveiwon · 13/09/2025 22:06

At this age the most important thing is his understanding. Does he understand what you say? Everyday activities like “Lets go to the park!”- would he look excited and go to the door? “Bath time now” - would he move towards the bathroom?

If he can understand you, everything else is very very likely to come over the next year/ 2 years. If he can’t, maybe see about booking a hearing test.

Also, remember that if he does have autism, there is nothing anyone can do at this age really (and the NHS doesn’t really like to do anything before 3 and even then it’s all teaching parents strategies, most of which you can find on the interest yourself) and he is still the same baby he was yesterday/ a month ago/ when he was born.

Also, my children didn’t really start signing until 14 months so he maybe just be a little young for that.

Thanks for your reply, yes I think he does understand a fair bit of what we say to him. Hopefully the speech will follow fairly soon. Useful to know about the signing though.

OP posts:
Hydrangea60 · 23/09/2025 21:50

OtterMummy2024 · 14/09/2025 07:29

I delayed doing that ASQ until the latest possible date. Four extra weeks (compared to the first possible date) made a huge difference to how many things DC "passed". And it's very normal for babies who are learning to cruise/ walk to ONLY want to do that and concentrate on nothing else.

Did the HV suggest revisiting things in a month or two?

Yes he's having another review at the beginning of November, so he'll have just turned 13 months at that point. He'll be 12 months next week though and has made no further progress at all so I'm not hopeful at all that there will be any significant change by then :(

OP posts:
Hydrangea60 · 23/09/2025 21:51

BunnyRuddington · 14/09/2025 07:54

If it was the 12 month Ages & Stages, he was at the very beginning of the age range for that assessment. It goes from 12 months to 12 months and 30 days.

I would do the assessment again a couple, in the week before he turns 13 months and see how he scores then.

If he still scored in the black for communication I would suggest you ask your HV for a hearing test for him and a referral to Portage.

Has the HV booked a further appointment with you?

Thanks, yes we are having another review at 13 months but there's been no progress so far so I doubt anything will have changed unfortunately. I don't think there's a problem with his hearing as he responds to sounds.

What is Portage?

OP posts:
Hydrangea60 · 23/09/2025 21:52

Cinai · 14/09/2025 08:34

Mine sounds exactly like yours, he’s 12 months old, very sociable and doesn’t do any of the things you mentioned. He only just now starts to copy me clapping etc sometimes, not always.

Thank you, that's reassuring. Did your HV say anything during the ASQ?

OP posts: