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How do i navigate this all

3 replies

Roundandroundagainandaga · 13/09/2025 08:33

A bit of back story
I left my daughter’s dad a couple of months ago. I want happy and I know he can’t have been we were always arguing our daughter is 1 I did everything for her he just liked that he had a daughter I didn’t doubt that he loved her I just felt like it was all on me, we didn’t have a relationship anymore hadn’t had sex since I got pregnant. He was always borrowing money off me I worked and he did too but god knows where his money would go. He smoked weed daily. He grew up in care. I’ve always made excuses for his mood/attitude/the way he was really. I have teenage daughters too. He had a good friendship with them they liked him but they were seeing all the arguments and I didn’t like that old atmospheres no one knows where they stand so I ended it.

he was staying somewhere and had to leave because he had an argument with them. Then was homeless.
he would send me threatening and horrible nasty messages.
he sound somewhere after a couple of days

I was never saying he couldn’t see him daughter but didn’t want him in my house that was now mine and my girls safe space.

he sees his daughter 2 days for a couple of hours a week.
he still continues to ask for money weekly begging pretty much a lot of the time.
I feel guilty.
we went to mediation to try communicate better he didn’t really agree with that method. He declined any further says we can do it.
he doesn’t give me money now he’s about to loose his job.
which means he will probably end up homeless again.
he’s told me he’s suicidal
I just don’t know what to do anymore

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 13/09/2025 08:53

You can’t save him. He’s spending his money on weed. That won’t help him mental health. He could choose to seek RL help from medical professionals but you can’t make him.

ChuckaPan · 13/09/2025 09:06

Honestly, it's not your responsibility or your problem. His relationship with his daughter is on him.

This man is an emotional and financial drain on you and your family. Let him sort himself out. If he wants to, he will.

I know that sounds callous but don't let him drag you all down with him.

WaterfallSounds · 13/09/2025 09:10

Put your children first - including the girls who are not his.

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