Never left daughter who is 3 in December overnight

[Sd1994]

Hi,
I have been asked by family to join them in travelling to Ireland next week. Lots of my immediate and extended family will be there and family flying in from USA too. I am also 29 weeks pregnant. I've never left my toddler overnight, who is 3 in Dec. My husband will be staying home so I don't need to worry about childcare. Just feel selfish really and worried she will pine for me. Everyone else leaving their kids at home with relatives that aren't going. My mom is encouraging me to come as I'd be flying out on Fri and returning Sunday and she thinks I need the break before baby 2 comes. I don't really know what I'm asking. Just unsure

Tell her before you leave that you'll be back. I'm sure she'll have a great time with her father. It's good for children to get used to nights without mother/father from an early age. Go and have a great time.

I can understand you feeling reluctant, especially as you haven’t had a night away from her yet but as the PP has said it will be good for them to have a night together.

Go and enjoy seeing your family for

You’re making a rod for your back never leaving her, esp with a baby on the way. Go have fun, kid has 2 capable parents, you don’t always need to be there

She’s in her home, with her dad, she will be fine. How long are you going for?

Sometimes I think it benefits the family to get them accustomed to members having the odd few hours / night away so they don’t end up in this situation. A night away could be necessitated by many situations especially when you have two dc, work or family support or if one dc was unwell for example and you would then be worrying about the one at home not settling for whatever reason while also trying to deal with the task in hand.

Also it will be good for them to be together at night before LO arrives. When you have the baby your DH will probably need to deal with her if she wales in the night. You may also be away for obe night or more when LO does arrive?

I didn’t leave DS until he was just over 3yo@Sd1994 - he stayed home with my husband for a night so I could attend a very close friends hen do. I’ll be honest, I felt physically sick at the thought of it 🫠 Not that DH isn’t capable - he’s a fantastic dad, I just couldn’t think of anything worse than being away from DS. DH also works away for weeks at a time so DS is extra attached to me and I was concerned how he would react to me being gone.
All went fine obviously. I had a lovely time seeing friends & DH and DS had a lovely night 😊
It’s not something I make a habit of doing to be honest - DS is now almost 5 and that’s the only time I’ve ever left him🙈 but I’m glad I know that I could if I ever needed to.

Go. Especially as you're pregnant with no.2. You deserve a break. And DH and DD need a close bond.

I can't tell whether you want to go?

You talk about your DM's view - but do you want to go?

If you want to go - go, if you don’t - don’t

It’s sensible to get her used to you being away.

I have a 10 month old , a nearly 4 and a 5.5 year old I’ve only left them when I’ve been in labour with their sibling there’s nothing wrong with not wanting to leave your young child overnight

Nothing wrong with it at all. But from a different perspective, I worked night shifts on a rota due to my emergency services job when my dc were young so it was always normal for our family to have dad on overnights say 40% of the time. I knew the dc were safe at home with someone who loved them and everybody was able to do what they needed to do.

Flying out Friday afternoon returning Sunday evening x

I'd like to go but I'm just so nervous to leave her. I know I could do with a break as I rarely have a spare minute to myself but just feel torn

Perhaps it would be good practise for when you have to leave her if you go into hospital to have baby number 2? If you do want to go of course. A bit of a trial run before the big day when baby number 2 comes and you have no choice!