Larger age gap children winding each other up constantly!

[Jewells17]

Is anyone in a similar position to me?
my children are 7 years apart, 11 and 4
and they are constantly winding eachother up/ arguing/ fighting over things, even when onenof them doesn’t even want something they’ll just do it to wind each other up
They cannot be in the same room for longer than 5 minutes until one of them (usually the 4 year old) is crying
days out are extremely overwhelming and tiring as they end up arguing and I’m drained.
They are lovely on their own, but together I am really struggling to carry on like this. I am so miserable every day.

They are tricky ages as your oldest is not old enough to really go out on their own yet but too old for little kid stuff. It gets easier in another couple of years when oldest is doing their own thing more. I had 2 older ones and then when they were 6&9 had a third and it was a juggle at those ages.

I have no advice but have a similar situation with my nephew who is 12 who spends a lot of time at our house and my 4 year old. They are almost unbearable together, it causes me so much stress. I spend the entire time bargaining with them both to leave each other alone and stop winding each other up/ fighting.

I find after basically begging the 12 year old not to it eventually eases after a mad hour or so.

I am the other end of the spectrum with a 1 and 7 year old. I'd have never thought they'd fall out at these ages but god do they. It's like my 7 year old reverts into a 1 year old too.