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Looking for advice – how to help 1 year olds confidence

3 replies

ThatOchreQuoter · 06/09/2025 11:27

My little one is currently 14 months. She's always been quite ‘serious’ when we’re out and about, but at home she's the happiest, most playful child – full of giggles and energy. She doesn’t usually smile at strangers and tends to be quite reserved in unfamiliar settings.

She’s very inquisitive and observant – always taking everything in and watching what’s going on around her. Sometimes, though, she can seem a bit overwhelmed in busy or noisy environments, especially if there’s a lot happening at once.

We’ve been going to the same weekly baby class since she was 6 weeks old – it’s a singing and signing class where we all sit in a circle. Even after all this time, she still doesn’t seem completely at ease there. While other children her age are confidently crawling or walking into the middle of the circle, she prefers to stay close to me. Last week, another little girl tapped her arm and she burst into tears.

I was quite shy as a child myself, although I think people would probably describe me as confident now. I’m consciously avoiding using the word shy with my daughter – I see it as an emotion rather than a fixed personality trait, and I remember how being labelled as shy made me feel growing up.

I’m a very responsive parent, so she knows she’s safe and secure with me – but I’d love some ideas for how I can encourage her to explore and feel more confident in group settings without pushing her too much.

Has anyone else experienced something similar?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
CeciliaMars · 06/09/2025 11:34

Just keep being there for her, modelling behaviour and giving her lots of cuddles. That's all you can do!

NuffSaidSam · 06/09/2025 11:35

I'd stop going to the sing and sign, if after a year, she still doesn't really like it! Go somewhere else that she will enjoy.

Kids are all different and some will be naturally more reserved than others. There isn't really a huge amount you can do other than gently push and encourage steps to independence, but always be her safe space to come back to. But it sounds like you're doing a great job with that already.

She'll likely grow out of it to an extent, but may just always be a more introverted person and that's fine. There's nothing wrong with being more reserved or someone who enjoys small groups or someone who prefers self-directed activities.

CaffeinatedSeagull · 08/09/2025 11:59

Theres a lot of parallels there with how my little one was at around that age.

Does your little one go to nursery? Ours goes 2 days a week and we found that helped ours massively with her confidence and development.

Stop the sing and sign, and maybe go to a play group regularly instead, let her play with other children.

It’s natural to worry, but your daughter will be fine. There’s nothing wrong with being the ‘shy and quiet one’ but just keep being there for her and supporting her. You’re both doing great.

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