Can some seasoned parents come and talk some sense into an anxious FTM.

[Tidalwave9]

DD is just turned 3, and I struggle with my anxiety (I’m on sertraline). I actually deal with things quite well now, she’s in childcare - I work, DH works. We all function quite normally.

Except today she’s been struck with D&V, and it broke my heart to see her so unwell, and here I am at 10pm thinking if I can’t cope with her throwing up, how am I going to handle worrying about the big stuff as she gets older. The actual big, worrying stuff like being able to drive a car around or moving out and not knowing she’s safe. It feels stupid because she’s 3 and tucked up safe in bed right now but.. how do you do it? I feel almost sick, like I can’t spend the rest of my life feeling this way. Does it get easier?

Totally normal to feel like this I think. One of mine had an awful stomach bug at 3 and she looked horrendous and felt so poorly, it was heartbreaking. She’ll be ok though and so will you. One step at a time - don’t worry about the future stuff, you’ll cross that bridge when you come to it.

Oh also I read someone saying that being a parent is like having a piece of your heart walking around outside your body and I thought that was very accurate and also reflects how vulnerable it makes you feel - like your whole life now depends on this little persons wellbeing and happiness. It’s scary if you think about it too much, so I try not to, and try just to feel grateful that mine are safe.

Thank you, @UpUpAwayz - I really needed to read that tonight. It is so easy to spiral, I need to remember to be present.

Oh love, it’s so awful when they’re ill. I don’t know if everyone feels like this but it’s not abnormal. You know before you had her you couldn’t imagine how much you’d love her? You currently don’t know how strong you are and what you’ll be able to handle when you have to. The weight of responsibility can take your breath away but you’ll face things as they come, she’ll get bigger and stronger, you’ll get perspective from the things that kept you up all night which she quickly forgets.

My eldest is 6 and I’ve got a toddler so we’ve got a load more childhood ahead but I’m a step mum of teens and the things that have gone on which everyone’s got through I couldn’t have imagined when they were tiny. You just get on with it one way or another. She’s lucky to have you 💐

Hope she’s better very soon.

I’ve got teenagers. It gets easier. Less visceral. But you still worry, just in a way that means you can all function and they can be free. You’re doing a great job!