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Parenting

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Is this bullying ?

1 reply

Mumtotwokids · 27/08/2025 22:40

Just after some advice please. DD is starting secondary in September. Has been with same girls and they are all going up together in same tutor (despite requesting otherwise). Had some issues with two that live next door who are in the class, used to all hang out but over the last year or two this has slowly stopped with them hanging out together and my daughter not. She seems okay with it but recent this girl started a group about meeting up at park and left my daughter off this purposely and now I’ve been sent a video of her being unkind about daughter on TikTok (although she says this was not nasty and has deleted post before we could see properly). I have approached the mums before but they have never been interested as their daughters are okay and now feel I cant say anything at all. Is this bullying? I think not but is they don’t want to hang out with my daughter just leave her be! Husband says we should leave at moment as secondary is a week away and doesn’t want to cause upset. The new school are aware (daughter did not want to move after a good transition day and another friend being in there). Would you give it benefit of doubt as daughter is okay and see how things go? I saw red seeing it but have calmed down now as I know this happens. Thank you.

OP posts:
WifeOfAGemini · 28/08/2025 04:22

I wouldn’t talk to the other girls’ parents but this does sound like a potentially horrible situation/ potentially toxic. How big is the school she is moving into? Is it mixed?
I would monitor situation closely.

My dd went to a large school and they mixed the kids up so only maximum two or three from each primary school per class. Dd stayed friends with her old bffs for a year but in that year also made new friends. By end of year 8 she barely mentioned her old school friends. Many friendships rapidly change at secondary school so I wouldn’t overthink it.

Strongly encourage your dd to make new friends.

If these girls start making her life unpleasant then ask her to talk to form tutor and/or straight away email the year7 email address/form tutor to follow up.

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