DS13 out with friends

[Mmmteeenywene]

Help! Im new to this teenage stuff so need opinions. Ds13 wanted to do a sleepover at a friends house tonight, but the last time he went there, the friends mum let them stay out til 11pm, so i said no.
Then ds asked if he could go to town with this friend tonight, but i said no way on a friday night. (we live in a small town). He webt to spend time with this friend and I said he needs to be home by 9.30. I saw from his location that he did go to town in between hone and friends house. Wwyd? Qould you pull hil up on it or let it slide? I dont want him knowing i keep an eye on him in case it makes him more secretive, but i dont like the lying either. He knows i see his location btw.

Sorry for all the typos.. typing in a hurry

Well you keep saying no to everything so what could he do that you would say yes to?

The lying is the worst but and what I would be focussing on and why he felt he needed to

What are you actually worried about? I would be discussing that with ds and how to handle it. And asking him what he thinks appropriate boundaries are. And go from there.

Ok. Ds's dad was on the same page (divorced though). He also said no way to 11pm outing on a sleepover. What am i afraid of? Bigger kids, vape drugs, alcohol..

If you tell him you know where he went then he’ll start faking his location on his phone. For example if he leaves his phone at “home”, downloads a GPS location faker or uses airplane mode then his location will appear an at approve place.

Yanbu to be unhappy about the lying but you know your son best - is he confident enough to say that he’s not allowed out past 9.30 rather than give into temptation or peer pressure?

The plan was for them to stay out in the nearby playground til past 11pm and film videos. The parents of this boy allow it. I don't see why any 13 year old should be out at that time. Nothing good and healthy happens at that time of night in the dark.
Is it common for 13 year olds hang out outside that time in the night? Some of them are still 12! The other 2 boys in that friendship group are allowed to sleep over. I dont know if their parents know they are outside and not in the house. Ds and one of these friends got caught shoplifting last year. They were very sorry and promised not to do it again, but i guess the less opportunities they have of wrongdoing the better. Or am i too strict?