My toddlers obsession seems very extreme, looking for advice

[Afternoonteaforme1]

Hi, I’m wondering if this is neurotypical, our 2.5 year old is obsessed with the same outfit, she’s been like this for weeks now, won’t take it off for bed or when at nursery, we’ve had to take it off to bath her and then obviously to wash it but every time she tantrums for about 40 mins until she’s almost sick, I have tried everything and I’m at our wits end, my first never did this so I’m unsure if this is typical behaviour, she can talk and plays well but I have no idea how to manage this, thank you

It sounds quite normal for a 2 year old. I’d be worried if they were 6 but not at 2. Mine also had an outfit she absolutely loved and would be distraught when it was in the wash. But I didn’t let her wear it constantly, I would tell her it was in the wash and getting clean and that day she would need to wear something else. I can’t really remember how she got over it, think she just gradually did and forgot about it. She still likes comfy clothes more than trendy clothes now at 9 but to be fair I’m the same. Rather be in trainers than heels for example!

On its own at 2 doesn't sound too wild, DS had the same, had to keep the outfit for this big cuddly bear he had to wear as he was so upset he had grown out of it. It will hopefully pass in time, its hard but not cruel to be firm about needing to wash it, wear something else etc.

Is it a particular colour/character? Ive certainly had my children sleeping in their favourite clothes and wanting to wear things on repeat.

My first though - although it’ll feed into the obsession potentially, would be if it’s clothes from a particular theme, to buy similar pyjamas and a copy of the outfit so it’s easier to persuade an outfit change.

its not really a particular character as such, its the first thing she talks about when she wakes up and last thing before bed, I hope she grows out of it poor thing as I hate seeing her so upset when she changes, she threw a tantrum for 40 mins before nursery this morning because I had to take it off and when I came back in the room she had put it back on herself!

Sounds normal for a 2yo. My middle child was obsessed with a Christmas tshirt that had a kitten on it which said “Meowy Christmas”. I’ve got photos of her still wearing it in September 😂 She’s 12 now, still loves clothes but not like that! Her older sister is autistic and never had a favourite outfit - just found most clothes incredibly uncomfortable.

make up a social story eg: a tiny rip means it had to be sent to the menders and will be back in 3 days.

Can you get her some more versions of the same outfit? I would make a note of this for future reference, she's only two so it could just be her age but you won't know either way until she gets older.

My niece was just like this. She wore an outfit day after day until,she was bursting out of it then she would get a new outfit. Now she’s doing a fashion course at the university of the arts. She has always been quite visual.

My toddler is the same, he only wants to wear one outfit with Spidey. He doesn't even watch the cartoon but his best friend from nursery is obsessed with Spidey.

We now have three identical t shirts and sometimes I manage to persuade him to wear a similar top with Spidey. I don't like character clothes but it's not a battle I'm willing to fight.

I believe he's neurotypical.

Totally normal to have a favourite t-shirt, outfit, dress, and having epic tantrums when you need to wash it.

DD1 didn't want to wear the same outfit, but had very strong views about choosing what to wear, from about 18 months! I remember as a baby when she could just about crawl, she put on all my bras at once from my underwear drawer. Not fastened but on the right way, one over the top of the other. DD2 was the complete opposite and would happily wear anything. DD1 is really into clothes still age 20, and is very aesthetic. She's doing a design course at uni. DD2 (16) is now a bit into fashion but just wears comfy hoodies and jeans most of the time. And she asks my advice about clothes, DD1 never would!

What I would do is get a spare set the same.

Sounds normal. My DS was a pirate from age 2-4. Thankfully he accepted a range of pirate costumes and pyjamas rather than wearing the same one all day and to bed.

Can you buy a second one?

At 2 dd was obsessed with triangles. I have memories of trying to cut carrots into triangles. It is quite difficult to cut carrots into triangles.

She is now 15 and obsessed with her boyfriend! 😂