How To Be Competent

[whydoeseveryonelovepeppapig]

hello - really fed up with not being bloody competent. I'd really appreciate some outside tips.
Feel like I'm not doing any one thing to any great standard, to the point where I'm being asked why I can't function! I'm tired all the time, get no head space from DD (4), (other than when at nursery term time), can not get the place organised, given up wearing make up and outfits are just not looking good. Reduced my work hours, so reduced my income, had to leave a toxic workplace, but husband does help; he's on 2 jobs. Makes it more annoying because he has success to show.
How have you managed to rebuild your lives as mothers? I'm trying to build a business on the side, doing the childcare/most chores.
I think I'm also perimenopausal which doesn't help; feel like i'm just going from one task to another
quite isolated and no family to reply on for support

just looking for tips on how to get it all done, competently
be kind

I don't think you can get it all done. You need to be kind to yourself. You're doing ok, and that's good enough. Less time on social media may help you avoid silly expectations.

I agree with PP that being kind to yourself is key. Being self-critical is only going to make you less organised and productive as you waste brain power thinking you are rubbish! My question is who is asking why you can't function? Is this a DH problem? My DH would see me struggling as a time to support and cherish me, not criticise me. It might be worth asking your GP to check bloods for iron levels etc if you are tired all the time, just to rule out any physiological reason for your lack of productivity. Otherwise, repeat the mantra "this is a phase if my life. In a year when she's at school and beginning to be more independent, things will start to change".