Is it NORMAL to feel this EXHAUSTED!?!?? Or am I ill?

[sushistar]

DS is 6 months. He's never slept through - he usually wakes up at 2am ish - but as he's breastfed I just pull him into bed with us and feed him, half dozing, all night. I don't mind, I think he's a lot better sleeper than many babies - he never cries or wakes up at night except to ask for a feed. I never have the whole pacing-up-and-down-with-screaming-baby thing.

During the day, I do housework, go to baby groups, I'm doing a breastfeeding course, cook... just normal stuff.

But I am EXHAUSTED. Really, really shattered. Like zone-out-by-8pm can't-even-carry-baby-anymore exhausted. I'm crap company for my poor dh when he comes home from work. I just feel like crying.

Is this just a normal part of parenting? Or am I anaemic or something? I had really low iron after the birth. Or maybe I have glandulaar fever again, I had that when I was a teenager. Or am I just looking for a reason for something that is normal for a parent of a 6 month old?

It is normal to be tired def. but you sound shattered TBH.

Perhaps you should go to your GP and have some blood tests esp. if you have had glandular fever before.

Hope you feel better soon.

It's always worth getting checked for iron deficiency, but if you are only dozing half the night, yo uwill feel knackered. The fact you are able to go out and about to things is a good sign.
I have to say that my ds is 21 mths and many evenings I am too tired to talk!

Sounds a little extreme - would definitely get tested for anaemia and/or glandular fever; I've had both and they can really knock you. Would also try and lie down during the day when your baby naps - I did that for months after DD1 was born.

Saying that, I am now pg with number 3 and can totally relate to the all-consuming exhaustion. Took my DDs round to a friend's house for a playdate this afternoon and fell asleep on their sofa

I feel like you but I'm pregnant again. I would say that you're feeling more tired than you should be and def go to the GP and get checked out.

My LO was feeding every 3 hours through the night still at 10 months (soon put a stop to that once I realised what was going on!) and I wasn't nearly as tired as you're describing.

Glandular fever can be a trigger for ME/Chronic Fatigue. So can birth trauma - that and a flu virus when ds was 6 weeks old set my own illness off. However, it was almost two years before it was fully tested and diagnosed - when you go to the doctor's a few months after having a baby they just tell you it's normal to be tired. But in my case I would see other new mums getting on with things and having at least some energy, whereas I was often too tired to even think and riddled with pains I'd never experienced before.

You could look into ME symptoms and see if it looks like what you're experiencing. Then go to your gp and ask to be referred for testing. Unfortunately there's no specific test for chronic fatigue and diagnosis is by elimination, but if you push (hard, I know, when you're already exhausted) you might get to the bottom of this.

However, even with a dx there's no real treatment for ME, you just have to learn to pace activity so you don't overdo it. But the good news is it's being taken much more seriously now than it was in the 'Yuppie Flu' days, and there's some good advice and support out there.

You could also ask for your thyroid to be checked (it would be routinely as part of CFS testing anyway) as the gland can enlarge during pregnancy and shrink back after birth, leaving you feeling exhausted.

Take care of yourself. Look at what's essential in terms of day-to day activities and ditch the rest. Your health is more important than hoovering, trust me.

You sound a busy mum. Like others have said maybe getting checked out is a good idea.

Do you get chance to have a nap in the day when your baby is asleep.

I remember this was a godsend for me when my dc were little, even now I try and catch 10 mins when I can.

Maybe a good quality multi-vit too.

Take care.

Thank you all. I will go to the GP - I've been putting it off tbh, I'm so sure I'll get a patronising smile and 'well, it's early days dear' sort of thing. But I'll at least ask them to check my iron.

Can I ask - I'm a very 'go with the flow' kinda mum but when do babies start NOT needing feeding at night? So far I havn't even tried not feeding him when he grumbles.

I've just started him on solids and he had a whole HALF of a large banana this evening - do you think it will make a difference?

Def go to the docs to get it checked but with both my babies i did have real dips in energy levels at five months. It sounds like you are doing a lot, if you can (and i was rubbish at this) rest when your baby rests and take it a bit easier. I don't know the biology but I think breast finding is tiring and I remember feeling all life had been sucked (literally) out of me by this stage.

For what its worth, I think they sleep through when they are ready and not before. My eldest was 8 months and my youngest 9 months (both BF).. I tried various things including late night bottle feed, offering cool boiled water instead of boob, leaving to cry for a bit and nothing seemed to work until one magical night, I woke and it was 5.30 and that was it! Solids may help but I wouldn't expect an immediate impact, it might not be hunger that's waking him, could be thirst or just general comfort.

Good luck !

I have been feeling a bit like you. Literally, I was falling asleep everytime I sat down to feed etc!

I have now got my DH to take over sometimes when he can. On days he is not at work, we take it in turns to have a lie in, which really helps. I still BF, he just brings her up when she is hungry, if she falls asleep, she stays in bed with me, if not, he then takes her back downstairs. It does mean I have more to do when I get up (DH wouldn't cope with doing more than looking after DD!!) but its worth it to get the extra sleep. He also takes her for walks etc. It really helps to have a bit of time to rest.

What time does your DS go to bed? Time to rest in the evening reallly helps too. DD used to stay up with us, she now goes to bed 7-8pm ish which then gives us time together.

Will your DS take a bottle? Maybe you could express some milk so somebody can give you a break?

dont rely on food making him sleep through unfortunately - ds ate shedloads and it didnt make a difference. what did was that eventually i got too knackered to keep getting up and we did cc
[runs and hides]

Sushistar - I recently was told by my doctor that my iron levels were low too probably due to bf. It really does affect your energy levels. I have been taking Floradix iron tablets (recommended) because I am bfing my dd 14 months too. I take them 3 - times a day and its made the world of difference.

after birth of each of 3 children was shattered for 1st 8mths. once they were on solids & going to bed at 7 none of them used to wake before 6.30 am. i am anaemic & can still have odd days when i dont feel as though I can even get dressed but making sure im strict with my diet helps. plenty of green veg (spinach, broccoli etc) with every lunch & dinner.