Desperate, please help

[Dissappearedupmyownarse]

Hi everyone,
I'm absolutely desperate and need help ASAP.
I have 1yr old that currently co-sleeps as she still breastfeeds during the night and it is her comfort way of going to sleep. I tried from newborn to get her to sleep in her next to me cot but after weeks of relentless every 30mins waking up, I gave in and in to my bed she came. Problem solved and I don't mind co-sleeping one little bit, however.....
I've hurt my back. Im in absolute agony with a herniated disc and I cannot even pick up my own baby. Im in absolute bits atm. Im unable to work as my job is physical (im SE) so I'm haemorrhaging money and I cant see a way out.
My back is absolute agony when I wake up and I know co-sleeping is contributing to this as if I try and roll over in the night it wakes up my baby and then she screams for me wanting my boob in order to settle.
I need to change this situation asap but am terrified that if I try and move her to a cot bed even next to mine, she will wake up repeatedly and I just cant keep getting up and trying to settle her bending down into a cot. She's also crawling/trying to stand up so I doubt she will stay in a cot bed with the side off?
She should be sleeping through the night now but wakes whenever I move so maybe being in her own bed will mean she will get an undisturbed night's sleep?
I don't want to do a cry it out method so please don't suggest that.
Im absolutely desperate to get better as quickly as possible. Please help 😔😔 xx

Do you have a partner? Babies father? I think they should co sleep. See a physio about your back if you haven't already and speak to the GP to see what painkillers you can take while bf.

There is no should about a one year old sleeping throught the night. Most aren’t at this age and several won’t be for many years.

I’m sorry to hear about your back. If you have a partner I would ask them to cosleep over night for now and offer a bottle as needed. If you’re going to continue to sleep then you need a pillow between your knees and swap the side you sleep on frequently.

This sounds tough. Do you have a partner that she might sleep next to? Or, in my case, DS would only BF to sleep for me but my DH would walk around with him in his arms and that also got him off back to sleep.

Unfortunately, I don't have any advice for getting her to sleep through - mine didn't until around 2.5 - 3 😩

Thank you everyone who has replied so far.
Im currently seeing a physio and am taking ibuprofen which is pretty much all that can be taken whilst breastfeeding. None of the muscle relaxants are licensed for use when BF so I cant take anything decent to stop the spasms.
Im just desperate to get back to work and earn some money but know that this won't be possible until I get a decent night's sleep where im able to switch positions frequently!
Yes i have a husband but she won't fall asleep for him and will cry her eyes out if he lays her down next to him

Thank you everyone who has replied so far.
Im currently seeing a physio and am taking ibuprofen which is pretty much all that can be taken whilst breastfeeding. None of the muscle relaxants are licensed for use when BF so I cant take anything decent to stop the spasms.
Im just desperate to get back to work and earn some money but know that this won't be possible until I get a decent night's sleep where im able to switch positions frequently!
Yes i have a husband but she won't fall asleep for him and will cry her eyes out if he lays her down next to him

You can take paracetomol too. Have you checked with breast feeding network about meds?

I’d let your partner do overnights from now on, maybe bring to you at set intervals for a breastfeed, then he takes her off again. Crying when Dad is lying right there to comfort is not the same as crying alone as part of a sleep training method and you absolutely need to rest to get better.

@Parksinyork I haven't no. Where can I access this information from please?
@Bitzee Yes I agree. She's always been a velcro baby and will cry when lying next to me if she cant find my boob in the night. She won't take a dummy so I just don't know what else to substitute boob with to help settle her? I'm absolutely at my wits end with my back. If it wasn't for my back, I'd happily keep co-sleeping as it works for us and we both enjoy it. There's nothing better than snuggling up to my baby girl in the night but I just don't know how much more pain I can take 😔😔

https://www.breastfeedingnetwork.org.uk

You can contact them directly. It’s run by a pharamist who has conducted research into how much of a range of different medications end up in breast milk.

@Parksinyork
Ive just found the breastfeeding network and looked up the drug that I know will help me (took it 6 years ago when I first hurt my back) its a muscle relaxant called Methocarbamol/Robaxin. Its not on there. From the bit of goggling I've done, it appears there's very little research on it in breastfeeding women so its not advised. There's no point asking my doctor as she didn't even know what Methocarbamol was when I first hurt it. It was my physio that recommended I take it.

The site is run by a pharmasist and know drugs is their job so contact them and ask them if they can recommend an alternative drug.

Ive been in contact already and im now waiting on a message back from one of the pharmacists. Thank you for the recommendation!
Ive also found a second hand cot bed locally so I will see if having her in there will help and if she settles. Any tips on transitioning from co-sleeping to cot would be most appreciated 🙈🙈

She's one, wean her

I would absolutely sleep somewhere else just for a few nights, and take the meds! I had to do this when mine was a little bit older to break the habit. He eventually co-slept with Dad.

Some times we have to put our own needs first. I was in different circumstances but at 10 months I had to go into hospital. At this point we coslept and breastfeed to sleep and she wouldn't settle for dad.
We had to leave her at home with dad at first and he had to figure out a way to get her to sleep. The first night was lots of pacing with her in a sling for a lot of the night but they found a rhythm. I had to stop breastfeeding completely as I had no other option than to move on to medication that I couldn't breastfeed on. For a few weeks-months dad was default parent at bedtime as I had to learnt to settle her without breastfeeding. We had the cot bed against the cot as a giant next to me and we settled her in there and then we moved on to our bed once she was settled

It’s such a toughy. I had a back problem after my first and was completely bent over looking at the floor. When I could I saw an osteopath who was amazing. It’s a really gentle way of sorting it
best of luck

Can you feed to sleep as usual and dad take over? You sleep In another room? Just switch for feeds. Will be a rough few nights but you’ll get through it. You need to make it as easy as possible for both of you and changing too much at once isn’t easy.

I second an osteopath, they are amazing. Again it takes time but will work better than any drug.