Hi, I’m looking for some advice as I’m feeling out of my depth and quite upset.
My son is 5. Last week he told me that while he was playing outside with a neighbour’s daughter, he “had a peek” at his willy near their treehouse and thought she might have seen. I asked if she had asked to see it, or if it was part of their game (they’d been playing “McDonald’s” beforehand), and he said no to both. He became upset and didn’t want to talk about it further. I comforted him and explained again why we keep our private parts private.
Today, a different neighbour’s daughter told me my son had asked to see her private parts. When I asked him about it, he said it was an accident, then said he didn’t know why he asked, and then became very upset and cried a lot. We’ve talked many times about what to do if someone asks to see his private parts (say no, walk away, and tell me), so I’m upset this has happened again so soon.
He’s generally a private boy — doesn’t like being seen in his underwear — so this behaviour feels out of character. I’m worried:
- Is this just childhood curiosity, or a sign someone’s said/done something to him?
- Should I take him to the GP or speak to school?
- How can I talk to him about this without shaming him but still making it clear it’s not acceptable?
Any advice from parents or professionals who’ve dealt with similar situations would be really appreciated. I want to handle this in a way that keeps him safe but doesn’t make him feel like he can’t talk to me.