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Original poster

When is a good time to have a third child?

30 replies

Yassnass134 · 11/08/2025 13:43

I don't know why this is on the forefront of my mind but I've been thinking about having a third lately.

I have a 3yo and 2yo. They are very close and are genuinely best friends. I feel like I have finally gotten some space to focus on me now .

I am thinking about having a third but I am so confused as to when a good time would be. I am 30 and am currently working 30 hours a week. I was thinking about waiting til the older two were in school. They demand so much of my energy I can't imagine having 3 at home together all the time.

Any advice is welcome. Anyone who wants to tell me to stop at 2 is also welcome!

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TheDisillusionedAnarchist · 12/08/2025 09:23

Look up Mumsnet threads on having
a. A second child
b. A third child.
c. A fourth child

note that everyone is overwhelmingly positive about having a second child, third child threads tend to a predominance of ‘I don’t regret it but…..’ and then a list of negatives as long as your arm and fourth child threads are far more mixed but overall tend positive.

From this I took it as have two or four so I stuck at 2 (living). However on some days I wish I’d had one!

TheaBrandt1 · 12/08/2025 09:40

You must absolutely love parenting to have 3! Perimenopause hits and you lose those hormones and honestly you then just cba. Or maybe that’s just me - and literally all my friends 😀

Original poster
Yassnass134 · 12/08/2025 14:13

TheaBrandt1 · 12/08/2025 09:40

You must absolutely love parenting to have 3! Perimenopause hits and you lose those hormones and honestly you then just cba. Or maybe that’s just me - and literally all my friends 😀

I don't know what it is. I never understood what people meant when they said they felt broody but honestly that's how I feel. It makes no sense for me to want a third child but I really want one. 😭

I can afford a third child and I am grateful that I can afford not to work. I have been transitioning to voluntary work with children recently, so maybe I will sack my career and will go onto doing that. I think I should sit on this feeling though, it must be hormonal but I've been feeling this way for months.

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Original poster
Yassnass134 · 12/08/2025 14:14

TheDisillusionedAnarchist · 12/08/2025 09:23

Look up Mumsnet threads on having
a. A second child
b. A third child.
c. A fourth child

note that everyone is overwhelmingly positive about having a second child, third child threads tend to a predominance of ‘I don’t regret it but…..’ and then a list of negatives as long as your arm and fourth child threads are far more mixed but overall tend positive.

From this I took it as have two or four so I stuck at 2 (living). However on some days I wish I’d had one!

I agree with this somewhat. I have been saying to myself that I don't know anyone with 3+ kids who is living a life that I can imagine living myself. Then again, I was oblivious to motherhood before it happened and here I am wanting a third.

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Original poster
Yassnass134 · 12/08/2025 14:15

MissHollysDolly · 11/08/2025 13:54

If you wait too long you’d be better off having four. Now would be good - less of a gap.

This might end up being the case.

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