Stay at home mum

[lisa270988]

Hi all
Is anyone else on here a stay at home mum and just manage on the wage? My husband works and I am a stay at home mum. We manage ok with money we do get universal credits to help top my husband wages up which I feel bad about claiming sometimes. We live a fairly decent lifestyle we both have a run have a little bit of extra left over each month for a day out we have one little holiday in a caravan a year.
I feel bad sometimes that we shouldn't have any extra if we claim uc

Well it’s only temporary with UC as you have to find work once DC are old enough so just enjoy it for now I guess. Before you know it you will be back at work and this time will be gone

Do you want a job?

I would like to but it's hard to find something to fit in around my husband

Don’t feel bad. No one else does!

Spend some time to think about how you’ll get yourself back into work once the kids are old enough: for example once they can travel to and from school safely and be at home alone for a while before you get home from work. Research the cost of breakfast, after school and holiday clubs in case you could earn enough to afford them.

How old are your kids because when your youngest is 2 they'll be getting you in the jobcentre monthly to prepare for going back to work. I'm in the exact position you are but I'm actively looking for work. It's the childcare that's the killer

You don’t need to fit around your husband, you need to find a job that’s within normal childcare hours and then work with your husband to share out drop offs and pick ups where possible.

I don't want him to go to childcare loads he goes 2 mornings a week

3

If you're claiming UC then they will expect you to be looking for work and to sort childcare for your little one. If you don't want to put him in childcare then don't claim benefits. They aren't there to allow people to be sahm's because they just wanna

So how are you getting around the UC making you look for work?

They have never questioned it yet and he 3 and half. I look for jobs but i can't seem to find anything that would fit around childcare he only does 9-12, all I have done is care work which is long hours. My husband sharing they drop off and collections for the childcare isn't an option

They don't ever ask I never see them or anything

You have to earn a certain amount for them to be happy if your a couple or have to earn over 1800k between you which my husband wages are more then that so they happy

I can't imagine you'll be able to claim for much longer as they'll be expecting you to work.

Could you live on 18k between you? The extra you get is temporary and the longer you are out of work the harder it will be to get back in. I was a SAHM for 20 years while mine were young (no UC) but I only managed to get back to work by fabricating a work history at a dissolved company but with a digital footprint you can’t even blag it these days. I wouldn’t like to be in your shoes this day and age. Are you paying in for a pension?

So what do you want from this thread OP? What’s the question?

Finding work around your husband’s job is a luxury that you probably can’t afford. If you want the lifestyle where your child is in minimal childcare then you need to earn enough between you.

Now my children are in school I work school hours which is a massive luxury, I got here by getting established in my job so I could then prove I could work flexibly.

Didn’t realise how hard some mums (working mums) have it. Round where I am it’s all shopping trips, pub lunches, weekends away etc