Finding tween stage quite challenging…all the extra hours of time!!

[BuzzYourGirlfriendWooof]

Oh how I miss the good old days of my children sleeping 7-7 alongside decent naps…! I am finding it so hard now my 10 and 11 year olds are up much later. My youngest routinely wakes between 6 and 6:30 every day still, but doesn’t go to bed until 9/10pm ish now it’s the holidays. My eldest sleeps in slightly later (but I’m talking 7-7:30 🫠).

I am finding it SO hard to fill all the extra hours in the day. Even if we go out and do an activity for many hours AND they play out with friends, there’s still so much time where they default to screens (DS in particular).

They both have ADHD which doesn’t help as they’re very full on and loud. I feel like my husband and I get zero time together in the evenings. Anyone else?!

Both of mine have ADHD so you have my sympathy. Luckily the eldest is maninly inattentive.

The good news is that they get older and less dependent on you

Mine are late teens/early 20s and it does get so much easier. They’re both at work today and we’re all going out for a meal tonight avd we’re lucky if they get up half an hour before they’re due to leave for work.

One thing i would do is to get them to take a bit of responsibility for their own regulation, so introduce them to things like meditation and try and make it part of their day. Running is good too.

I don’t think this is an ADHD thing. I think this is just how they are. 😂 What I’ve found helps is booking them in for things they are interested in that will fill the evenings.

One of mine does a sport 3 evenings a week until 8/9pm. It uses up energy and gives them something to do that doesn’t require me providing entertainment or constant conversation. Having a friend over helps too.

But no, Dh and I get like zero time together that doesn’t have a child popping in. I like sleep (currently going through cancer treatment), so I’m often in bed before the dc are. I have no desire or capacity to stay up to spend time with Dh. Where we do get some time is when they are in activities or we have lunch together when they are at school.

Mine are the same at the moment, my eldest is up til 10 and there is no me time. Hopefully when school is back the bedtime might be back to 9pm!