Am I completely messing up this toddler stage?

[Dottyhedgehog]

I am a proud mummy to one very strong willed, stubborn yet highly intelligent and lovely little boy. He is 2.5 and my best friend but boy oh boy is he absolutely pushing every single button known to man in recent weeks. I feel exhausted mentally and physically!

He since birth pretty much, has always been on to the next thing, never content, always needs to be moving and entertained and this has just become more and more apparent as he’s got older. I would say he js advanced for his age, walked really early and talking fully. He’s a climber, a runner and has no fear! I have to have eyes on him pretty much all the time if we are not at home.

We have always tried to be firm but fair but have ended up in the throes of the terrible twos and honestly I have no idea what I’m doing! Everything feels like a battle, he pushes back against every single boundary no matter how small, he won’t follow any instructions, does the opposite of what you say, he has started to hit and kick and throw things when not getting his own way, bed time can take hours as he just gets up and down up and down. I find myself getting so frustrated with him recently. Tonight after attempting solo bedtime for nearly 2 hours and being SO patient eventually I just lost it and screamed at him. His face broke my heart.

I apologised to him, we had cuddles and another story in bed but I feel so angry and disappointed at myself. Honestly I am so worry I am raising a monster who will now shout at everyone whenever he is cross like I just did :(

just looking for moral support!

I saw a bit of advice which stuck with me which was make your home and life in a way that you have to say no to your child as little as possible. This doesn't mean they do whatever they please its just you only need to say no for fewer more important things and it has more power with them. Then pick your boundaries and be prepared to die on them hills. Consistency is absolutely key especially with intelligent toddlers who will take every mile they can.

That being said, he is still a toddler (and a spirited one at that) and you a human so all going to have good and bad days. I personally think kids should see emotional vulnerability from there parents who apologise for being wrong (aka the shouting) because how else will they learn humility? Anger is a valid emotion it just needs to be expressed properly, and apologising for maybe not expressing it in the right way is a healty way to work through that on occasion.

Im sure your doing a great job with a happy little boy!

I have no advice but just want to say I know how hard it is .I am also parent to an absolute hurricane of a toddler, same age he also throws his toys at us pinches and hits. He wants to walk everywhere hates his buggy but getting anywhere takes an age!! He escapes from his carseat!! Don't get me started on bedtime 😭. I think we just have to ride it out. As for losing patience we have all been there! We are only human and its bloody hard so don't beat yourself up. Your a good mum you wouldn't have posted if you weren't.