Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Flip

1 2 3 4

Original poster

MN POLL: would you go abroad for 2 weeks, if your daughter was 36-38 weeks pregnant with her 1st baby?

94 replies

robinredbreastnestbuilder · 28/05/2008 13:47

would you ?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

TheFallenMadonna · 28/05/2008 14:05

With her first baby? Yes.

Subsequent babies may raise childcare issues. But first would be OK.

DH went abroad for work when I was 37 weeks...

roquefort · 28/05/2008 14:07

should have said "would not arrange it deliberately"

TigerFeet · 28/05/2008 14:11

Depends really on how much you rely on your Mum... in my case it wouldn't bother me one jot as I wasn't reliant on her for emotional support or for childcare (first dc).

If she lived round the corner and we spoke every day I would probably be more bothered.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Families General parenting

potoftea · 28/05/2008 14:18

I think it's very over the top for parents to be that involved with their grandchild's birth. As long as the mother has a partner it's inappropiate to put their own holiday plans out to be there the week the baby is born.

Different thing totally if they have promised child care for other children, then they need to be available from about 36 weeks onwards at all times.

cmotdibbler · 28/05/2008 14:24

Dhs parents booked (whilst I was pg)to go to their villa in Turkey for 7 weeks, leaving when I was 35 weeks. DS was born that week so they didn't see him till he was 7 weeks old.

I was a little upset as he'll be our only child, and their last grandchild. But it was their choice, and not for me to say anything

ladytophamhatt · 28/05/2008 14:28

Haven't got any daugthers but I'd like to see any future granchildren ASAP so I prob wouldn't.

Especially if it was any of my boys and their partner having their first baby.
I think thats extra special.....

lulumama · 28/05/2008 14:31

first babies often late. so i would chance it , unless any reason to think baby would come early. if she was 36 weeks pregnant, then yes, if 38, then probably not..just in case. but i would want to be there. would not want to feel i had to be there

Alambil · 28/05/2008 14:34

Depends if she's the birthing partner or not!

My mum wouldn't have risked missing it because I was on my own - if you have a support network or DP/H then I don't see why they need to be on the doorstep...

SoupDragon · 28/05/2008 14:36

Yes.

It wouldn't be me that was having the baby.

no1putsbabyinthecorner · 28/05/2008 14:39

What about the other way round.
My mum had my brother then less than a week later went to greece for a week and left him with me and my sister.
Said she carried him 9 months and needed a break.
Probably why everyone thought he was mine and nearly 17 years later we are very very close

LittleBella · 28/05/2008 14:46

yes

hanaflower · 28/05/2008 14:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GrapefruitMoon · 28/05/2008 15:05

Well, as parents and ILs all live in a different country to us... they are already abroad!

Reminds me that MIL wanted to jump on a plane as soon as dc1 was born - we said no, give us a week or so... so she got in a huff and booked to go away when I was due!

belgo · 28/05/2008 15:11

I wouldn't mind if my parents went away at this time of pregnancy, they live in another country anyway.

We live close to my parents in law and they are going on a month long holiday the same month this baby is due. I don't mind at all, I know they'll help out plenty when they get back.

hatrick · 28/05/2008 15:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

NotABanana · 28/05/2008 15:11

No.

WilfSell · 28/05/2008 15:14

Yes. Your baby will probably come late (I think most first babies do), they probably booked it before you knew you were PG, you'll either be in hosp or want to babymoon and as others have said your mum can be more help when your DP has gone back to work.

You'll cope, honest...!

sweetkitty · 28/05/2008 15:15

Mine were 400 miles away so really not in the same country.

With DD2 none of the GPs volunteered to mind DD1 so I could go in to hospital for an induction anyway (had a HB in the end didn't need childcare) so it dodn't matter where they were.

This time no one has said anything about childcare again, they will probably want to come up after DD3 is born, have their lunch and endless cups of tea made then piss off for the next 3 months.

Can you tell I am a little bit bitter?

Swedes · 28/05/2008 15:16

Women who get all precious about their Mother not being on hand as PFB crowns are the same people who tell their Mother she can't visit for at least 2 weeks as her and Mr Uptight want some space with PFB, alone.

JodieG1 · 28/05/2008 15:18

No I wouldn't. My parents didn't when I was pregnant with any of mine. In fact, when my waters broke at 22 weeks with ds2 they were a godsend. They came over every day before dh went to work, my mum took the kids to school and my mum cleaned and cooked, she looked after ds1 after preschool too.

I don't know what I would have done without them as it took such a pressure off me, I was on bedrest and was terrified of losing the baby. Dh picked up the slack when he got in from work every night and at the weekends.

They even carried on coming over for a while after ds2 was born (after dh went back to work from his 2 weeks paternity leave).

They are amazing.

JodieG1 · 28/05/2008 15:22

Oh and my first baby arrived at 36 weeks and spent a week in scbu. My waters broke at 1am and when I called my mum knew it was going to be me saying the baby was coming, she told me my dad said told her not to be silly as I wasn't due for a while. She was right though.

JodieG1 · 28/05/2008 15:22

Wow excuse the awful grammar in that post

lilolilmanchester · 28/05/2008 15:37

Assuming I wasn't a birthing partner, I would go, if my daughter was genuinely happy for me to. But would probably be on first flight back if the baby was born. I have a few years to wait before this becomes a possibility though.

questionmaster · 28/05/2008 15:43

no way, i'd want to be there for my dd.

lilolilmanchester · 28/05/2008 15:47

My own Mum lives a 3 hour drive away from me, so she wasn't with me until the day after both our DCs were born. To be honest, it was nice just to have DH and babies to ourselves. So I'd not be concerned about having to fly back from a holiday to be with my DD. But I guess if my Mum had lived locally, I might have a different opinion based on a different personal experience.

Flip

1 2 3 4