Should I have a 2nd baby? (10 year age gap)

[Poodlezzz]

I am 34 with a 9 year old…. Thinking if I want another kid, it’s now or never. Really hard to choose as I’ve just got my independence back but at same time it would be lovely to a have one more and for my eldest to have a sibling (obv no guarantees they'd be close and also there is the big age gap) but perhaps they will still love each other and they’d hopefully have each others support as adults?

also I’m worried I’ll be too old and not have the energy and enthusiasm I had at 25?!

However - Life is short - should I go for it?

Friend of mine had her first at 18 and her second at 38. The 20 year old was thrilled!

I think 34 is not old! I think you could still opt to wait a couple of years.. if you want.I am 38 and on the fence about having another.. however I do think that’s a Big age gap- but does that matter?? In some ways I think a gap that much matters less than a gap of 3/4 years because they’re old enough to help you somewhat and be quite separate when needs be. I think it would be much harder with a gap of only a few years!!

Ten years between my dds and they adore each other, still do as adults.
If you want to, do it!

I had my first at 35 so it's perfectly doable. I found pregnancy absolutely brutal and I'm sure I would have been more energetic at 25 but I have money to pay for things to make my life easier.

My dad has a 2 year age gap with his older brother and 9 years with his younger one. He is very close to the younger brother, barely speaks to the older one. They/we go on holiday together every year even and have done so for 20 years now. They were not close growing up and my dad always says he found his baby brother annoying as hell and used to tease him a lot but as adults they're super close. So age gap is no guarantee of anything. Keep expectations low, don't pressure the older one to babysit too much, don't blame the baby for stuff, the usual things to help a good relationship I think