Should I be concerned about 14 year old ds?

[slet]

My eldest son is delightful. He is bright,
doing well at school, and has a good bunch of friends. He plays rugby, goes to explorers, is doing D of E and also plays an instrument and is pretty well rounded and sensible.

I do check his phone regularly and noticed recently he had been googling how to get a six pack. Lately he has been going for a 5k run most mornings which he tracks on strava, as well as rugby training twice a week. He also asked my husband yesterday about buying a type of cereal bar he likes but the “protein version”. This morning when he came back from his run his nostrils were flared and he had a slight “tracheal tug”. He is fine now but I think he has overdone it and he said that he wanted to get a pb on strava and so sprinted the last section.

I’m pleased he is being active and healthy but I’m just a bit worried about taking him too far. Am I overreacting to this? He is now taller than me and is clearly exasperated by me fussing over him like this saying I’m being over protective but I’m finding the adjustment to him being more independent a bit tricky and worried about getting it wrong. Any advice would be appreciated!

It’s good he wants to up his protein.

Maybe sit with him and do some meal plans of good protein rich meals and get him involved in cooking a few times a week. Even going out to buy the ingredients.

Only you can know if he’s taking it too far but I have an athlete DS (swimmer) and to be a top athlete it does take dedication and hard work so that in itself wouldn’t worry me. My ds swims 21 hours a week and does 3 strength and conditioning sessions as well as daily physio as he has a degenerative neuromuscular condition.

Je eats well and regularly and gets enough sleep so the training doesn’t concern me - it is what it is.

Yes that’s a good suggestion about the protein thank you. I think he thinks he needs to buy all the products but I know it’s better to fit it into meals.

what about the tracheal tug? I’m now worried about things like asthma induced by exercise.

I think your probably overreacting about most of this including the tracheal tug. He's obviously going to be out of breath if he has been sprinting/running. You should be happy he is interested in keeping fit and staying healthy (and trying to get a 6 pack!) Try get him to watch some YouTube or social media videos about healthy protein packed foods (there's tonnes out there) and encourage him to get into making some of his own healthy meals. Encourage his interest in fitness, it'll do him good for the future to get into good habits now.

Thanks.

im recently bereaved having lost my dad and im extra anxious about everyones health at the minute.

I’m pleased he wants to keep fit and I'm proud of him but i worry about him a lot.

My DC14 goes to the gym, does weights etc it’s normal amongst his friends to supplement their sporting activities. He does have a six pack and eats a protein rich diet. I’m comfortable with it all.

This all sounds perfectly normal for a 14 year old. I have no idea what a tracheal tug is. 🤷🏻‍♀️ But my 12 year old does gymnastics for like 3 hours 3 times a week and does a few 5k runs and eats healthy. As long as he’s eating proper food, not restricting and not getting into all these stupid supplements, it all sounds fine.

When my youngest dc was a baby he had bronchiolitis and had a tracheal tug which was where the fleshy part between the collar bones sucks in When you are breathing and it is a sign you are struggling for breath.

they sent a paramedic and I remember the paramedic saying it wasn’t as much of a concern in a baby as it would be in an older child or adult. It’s always stuck with me and so I panicked a bit when I saw ds this morning recovering from
his run and there was a definite tug and flared nostrils.

With the disclaimer that I’m not medically trained OP, my understanding of the concern about tracheal tug in infants/unwell older people, is when their body is struggling so hard to breath that the trachea is pulling in AT REST. Breathing hard after hard exercise is perfectly normal! Take a look at videos of athletes being interviewed just after crossing the finish line of their races. Unless there is info you aren’t sharing here, or he is experiencing other symptoms of failing health, I really wouldn’t be concerned about him breathing hard after sprinting.

PS I’m very sorry about the loss of your dad. It is also totally normal to fret disproportionately about things when you are dealing with grief. Please take care of yourself. It will no doubt take a long while for you to feel your usual, steady self again after such a loss.

i think him being active and healthy is great and not worrying at all. however nowadays especially with social media, boys are feeling a lot more pressure to look a cirtain way i.e. looking up how to get a six pack( probably also something his peers talk about a lot). so although keeping fit is good, it might be good to have a conversation about how he shouldn’t feel pressured to make his body fit unrealistic standards

It's very normal for boys of this age to start getting interested in fitness and building muscle. The most important thing is to make sure they do it in a healthy way without appearing to interfere too much (because as we know, teens will actively avoid doing something if they think you want them too!)

We had a few issues with DS2 at about 15 as he started chugging back the protein shakes and became quite obsessive about working out. Thankfully we got him some proper gym trainer sessions with someone he respected who pointed him more towards a protein-rich healthy diet rather than supplements. (And yes, it WAS the same sort of protein-rich diet I had recommended to him, but which he's ignored as obviously I knew nothing, despite being a qualified fitness instructor a decade ago...🙄)

Does he have other friends who are similarly inclined who he could perhaps work out with? I'd want to check that this wasn't something he was doing because he had been bullied for being thin etc. However the fact that he does rugby means this probably isn't the case.
FWIW there starts to be a lot of chat about bulk and fitness around the rugby clubs in this age group as it's when the boys begin to notice body shape changes etc.

I would want to make sure he understood about recovery, rest days and cross training are how you get stronger.
You also need to fuel it properly, more protein is good but also enough calories in total to maintain the training.

Sounds like a normal level of exercise to me. If he’s not gasping for breath, he won’t be working hard enough for a PB so again, pretty normal. He’s also demonstrating he understands the importance of protein, so I wouldn’t be worried at all.

Thank you for everyone’s reassurances on this. I know I should be pleased he is interested in being fit and healthy!