Universal credit for solo parent?

[Sam97x]

I currently have a 6 month old baby who I share with my partner. We live in our own home with a mortgage, however my partner only comes home once a month as he works down south in the Navy (we live in the north west). Because of this I am the sole carer of our baby pretty much 24/7. could i be entitled to UC once my maternity allowance stops after October? Does anyone else solo parent because their partner is in the armed forces and is entitled to anything?
Thank you

She said he has £2.7k per month in net pay, so I agree the point is moot and she’s unlikely to be entitled to choose not to work and claim benefits instead (one would hope) unless there’s some huge drip feed about extenuating circumstances she’s neglected to mention.

However, in general, why should a SAHM be funded for people who would prefer claiming benefits at the expense of other parents whose taxes will have to go up even more to fund these benefits for people who are capable of working? Why does the child of the former deserve taxpayer money to fund having a SAHP while as a result the second gets to see even less of their own parents to pay for this?

Are you proposing that benefits should be paid at a (much higher) level that is sufficient to make it viable for one parent to stay at home with their child in all circumstances until their child reaches X age? If so, how will this be funded?

Or are you proposing that children with parents who live in cheap areas/ parents who live in Council housing who can survive on the level of benefits paid currently should be provided with funding for a SAHP regardless of need and capability to work, and obviously rich people like Ms Badenoch can be a SAHP for several years funded by their wealthy partner, but all of those children with parents who are neither rich nor poor so cannot afford to live on benefits don’t deserve/ require a SAHP and should see their own parents even less, as an ever larger proportion of their parents’ earned income is swallowed up by tax to fund those claiming these unnecessary benefits? If so, please explain why it is beneficial for a SAHP for some children to be funded by others to the detriment of time with their own children. What makes it good for some children to have a SAHP - so essential we must all pay for it - and other children apparently not only don’t require this in your view but should have a lower standard of living to enable this for others?

Some (children) are more worthy than others, I guess. Animal farm being played out in UK society.

Maybe you should read my posts properly before posting utter nonsense misrepresenting them. I very clearly stated that it is chancers like this “looking into” whether she can get benefits because she’d “rather not work” who are causing the appalling attitudes towards those who are claiming benefits because they genuinely need them and creating a situation where there isn’t sufficient money available to support properly those who actually do need support. You can keep your unjustified vitriol to yourself.

And if you post about it on a public discussion board then you can expect people to give their opinions about it and probably shouldn’t be breaking the rules of that discussion board by insulting other posters and calling them “bitches”.

So if she is entitled you would prefer her not to claim it? Bit weird. See plenty of high earners claiming childcare they aren't entitled to by popping money into a pension to get under the threshold.

That would make them entitled to it.

Are you always this melodramatic? That plus the volatility and profanities aimed at strangers online is rather concerning behaviour for someone who is caring for a small baby.

This is the definition of gaslighting. Can you blame her for her response?

You need to have a strong conversation with him about moving onto the patch and living with him to get support. If not then he should look for an assignment closer to home. If he moans about how he doesn't want to rent his home out - its not his home as he is never there.

Coming home only once a month is appalling!!!! Even the guys who had huge commutes would generally make it every other weekend when I lived on a navy base on a navy base on the south coast. He wants to have a single block life and not show his commitment to his family.

Do you go and visit him or does he not allow you down? My concern would be that he has someone on the side if he does not. I have seen a huge number of sailors and soldiers that live a double life, making excuses that they are on exercise or duty so can't come home when really they are climbing into someone else's bed.

I suggest trying to get down for a visit. Its also good for you to meet those he lives and works with and know abit about his life the other 28 days of the month. There are welfare houses on many bases that can be hired for a family to visit for the weekend so it is completely safe to have a little one around for a visit. His welfare dept should be able to help and support this as they are there to help the family as well as the sailor. Get them involved to help find a better solution than this. He should love to have his little one visit so that he can show them off!

I think you need to have a discussion about him stepping up! You need support. Your baby deserves a happy healthy mum and a dad who is there.

Who else is responsible for her behaviour and how she speaks to people? That is gaslighting!

Exactly!!!

I think you are trolling now. 😂

This thread is just bizarre, isn’t it? That poster seems to be trying to imply that people saving for their pension from their own earnings is equivalent to someone trying to claim state benefits because they’d rather not work.

Time to put a thumb in the air and hope the Vogons are flying past.

At the end of the day being the sole 24/7 carer for a baby is hard for anyone. And yes there are people in much worse situations. it’s something I wouldn’t change for the world. I should’ve reworded the beginning of the thread to something like is there any support for armed forces families.

I’ve been a grafter all my life so I don’t really know how the system works. It’s all new to me. I’ve never been a mum before and gone back to work while my partners away and so I don’t know how the arrangement of childcare will work. But obviously I will make it work. I don’t understand how people have not been capable of just saying ‘no you won’t get anything’ instead of a full on lecture and going about their day?

How are they entitled when the only way they are entitled is if they squirrel away some of it so they it looks like they have a reduced income?

Plus isn't it rich to come onto this thread, lambast her when she was just saying she was only looking into claiming and then moan because she gave you the same tone back? If you have nothing nice to say..

It’s always hard when your partner works away, or shifts. Childcare isn’t easy when the hours you need aren’t regular. My ex was in the army, he wasn’t away for months on end but worked really anti-social shifts. When DD was a baby I found a childminder who was happy to only charge me for the hours I needed as long as I provided the hours a month in advance. When DD was older I also found a nursery who, when I told them the hours were due to army shifts, were happy to do the same. This enabled me to work full-time, without costing the earth in childcare fees.

Were you working before you had your baby? You mention ML payments but not where they’re coming from. It’s hard to go back to work when you don’t want to but it sounds like you can’t afford not to go back to work/get a job. Why not make some enquiries about how much childcare is close to your home and then you can figure out whether you can go back to work full or part time?

I was a self employed dog walker but my customers have all gone to someone new so would need to start from scratch if I was to do it again. I’m more than happy to work after she’s 1, I was just curious as to whether I could (NOT SHOULD like some people have said) get something the 3 months after MA stops.

We don’t know what you will or won’t get.

But you need to do the claim as a couple, not as a single parent because you’re not.

I know

Please if you go back to work OP, do not allow your partner to get away with you having to pay all the childcarex and I think you need to sit down and talk about finances. Are you even on the mortgage if you’re not married? If you’re not and he decides to split you will be homeless.

Not married but we joint own the house. And paid equally towards the deposit. I had been saving for 10 years to buy it, worked very hard and will work hard again. For those that are saying I’m work shy

Because it’s repellant that you think you should be entitled to benefits and “looking into” whether you can claim them rather than working when you have stated that you are perfectly capable of going back to work and supporting your own family financially on your salary and the very decent salary earned by your partner.

Couldn’t you have hired someone else on a temporary basis to walk the dogs while you went on mat leave? To keep your client base?

They’d pay you, you’d pay the dog walker you hired, with a contract which included a non-compete so they couldn’t steal your clients?

Did you have any loyal clients who would come back to you if you go back to work?

I don’t think I ‘should’ be entitled (third time) literally just wanted to know if I’d get something between the 3 months of MA stopping and her being 1 when im more than happy to work again. If not ITS OK, i was just curious!

Are you this aggressive towards all women who work less than they theoretically could and claim top-up benefits, or are you saving your vitriol for OP?

If your mat leave payment is maternity allowance, you won’t get anything after the 9 months payment. The expectation is that you find a job, which is what I had to do as I got made redundant when I was pregnant. Dog walking sounds like the perfect job for you! You can set your own hours and plan with a local childminder or nursery what those hours would be. There are loads of dogs everywhere so you’ll pick up clients again. Why not put out a few feelers now and see who you can attract?

You may also have to rethink not working until your baby is one. I had to go back to work when DD was 10 months old as a job offer came my way. I wasn’t in a position to turn it down.