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How to get my almost 3 year old to listen

6 replies

GreenPlant27 · 23/07/2025 20:37

My daughter is a very bright, beautiful and confident individual. She makes me proud everyday, but I'm really struggling for her to listen and acknowledge boundaries. I hate yelling and to be honest she doesn't listen when I raise my voice. This evening I totally lost it and screamed in her face, I asked her repeatedly to stop what she was doing and she found it hilarious. We all have the lurgy at the moment my youngest is teething so the past two nights I have had very little sleep along with being the parent that does all the nights shift and mornings. The past 3 years I can't say I have had many nights of undisturbed sleep, as both children have co-sleeped with me because it's the easiest way for us all to get some rest. If I'm being totally honest I am running on reserves and I'm I am very resentful to my partner at the moment he is a great Dad (he does every bath time and we both do put down, he also settles them until 23.00), but he totally undermines me when I'm trying to educate our daughter to stop doing things when asked.
I am totally ashamed with losing my temper and this will make me feel awful for a good time, my partner was very quick to come in and tell me I was totally out of order, which made me lose my temper more, I feel like I am a totally unfit parent

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
PearlsMaybe · 23/07/2025 20:39

I think you're okay tbh. But she will shout back at you when she's 15.

I was you ten year ago, and my DS has lungs of steel now.

I think it's okay to tell kids when they need to dial it back. You can only take so much and she needs you to be well and not run into the ground. She only gets one Mum and she needs to look after you too.

PearlsMaybe · 23/07/2025 20:40

The door slamming at 15 is hilarious btw. You might want to get your doors reinforced.

BunnyRuddington · 24/07/2025 07:46

can you give us some examples of how you’ve tried to stop your DD from doing things when asked and how your DP has undermined you?

And at 3 I think I’d be moving her to her own room so you can get some more sleep.

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StrictlyAFemaleFemale · 24/07/2025 07:57

Read how to talk so children will listen, and how to listen so children will talk.

DongDingBell · 24/07/2025 09:23

Can you give an example?

My suggestion "Don't draw there (on the walls - but don't say draw and walls together), draw on the paper. We will have to clear all this up later.

And even if they don't really make the job easier - they need to participate in the clean up.
Where possible, tell them what they should be doing - not what they shouldn't.

Mummabear04 · 24/07/2025 09:36

Look up Dr Siggie on Instagram!

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